


Spinning Our Tale

by Inside Your Ceiling (orphan_account)



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Writing & Publishing, Eventual Levi/Eren Yeager, Female Hange Zoë, Hange Zoë & Levi Are Best Friends, M/M, Major Illness, Writer Levi (Shingeki no Kyojin)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-11
Updated: 2016-10-24
Packaged: 2018-06-07 21:22:22
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 15
Words: 30,034
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6824839
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/Inside%20Your%20Ceiling
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Eren Jaeger, soon-to-be college student, loves reading. His favorite author, Ackerman, is known only by their last name. No one knows what they look like, or even their gender. Extreme popularity seems only to make the author more secretive. But once Eren meets this author without realizing who it is, he eventually manages to break down Levi's shell of secrecy.</p><p>But Levi, living a quiet life away from attention, has a much bigger secret than his identity. His own health is in danger, and only Eren can get him through his illness.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

"I'm just so excited that I might die," I said. I was in the car beside Armin, sitting in the passenger seat. School got out about an hour ago, and he had just picked me up from my house. At the moment, my own car was in the shop, being fixed.

"Please don't die, you should at least graduate first!" he said, laughing. Graduation was coming up in a little over a week, and I was most certainly looking forward to moving out. I was going to go to a university nearby, so I didn't have to move, but I wanted to. Mikasa, of course, had decided come with me. We would be getting an apartment together soon, to cut down on the cost. Luckily, Armin, Mikasa, and I would all be going to the same university.

Armin was going to go into biology, though he had been researching different choices to be certain. Neither Mikasa or I were sure yet. Eh, I'd figure it out eventually.

Right now, Armin and I were going to the bookstore because my favorite author just published a new book. Armin was probably just going to look around in the science section as usual, but I knew exactly which book I'd be looking at. _To Write Yourself Away_ , by Ackerman. No one knew who the author really was, other than their last name. It was even unknown if Ackerman was a man or a woman. I have no idea, myself. Because of their secrecy, they never do book signings or televised interviews, despite their massive popularity. I've met quite a few Ackermans, including my adopted sister, but I'm pretty sure none of them are _the_ Ackerman.

It was my dream to meet them. Their stories were amazing, and they, as an author, had received quite a few awards. They never attended any sort of ceremony, just accepted the award from wherever they were. In the literary world, there was quite a bit of debate over who it could be. Some people thought that it was an already established author who was just using a different pen name for certain books. Some people believed it was just someone who wasn't otherwise well known, who just shied away from attention. Those who thought Ackerman was just a pseudonym of a popular author would always have a new guess of who it was, and compared writing styles to see who had things in common with the Ackerman books. Occasionally, an author would say that they are the one using the Ackerman pseudonym, but whenever this happens, the publishing house would make a statement that whoever was trying to steal the fame was not, in fact, the author.

We pulled up in a parking spot, and I made sure I had my money before hopping out. The store's door was propped open, and the smell of coffee from the small bookstore cafe wafted out invitingly.

"You know where I'll be, just tell me whenever you're ready to leave!" I said excitedly to Armin, stepping through the doors of my favorite place in the world. I barely even noticed where he went as I rushed to the shelf of new books in the forefront of the store. From the top of the shelf all the way down to the middle, were many beautiful hard-cover copies of _To Write Yourself Away_.

I gently picked one up, handling it carefully. I avoided the inside flap, seeing as I never read summaries of books from my favorite authors so that the book could be a full surprise to me. I just turned it over in my hands, admiring the simple, yet eye-catching, cover. It had a small boy sitting against a wall on a street, writing something down. The picture looked like a painting, and I liked the look of it.

I knew Armin would probably take a while, so I walked over to the small cafe on the side of the store, and sat in one of the cushioned chairs.

I opened the book, flipping through every page up until the first chapter began. As I started reading, I felt weirdly uncomfortable for a few seconds, as if someone was watching me. I looked up, and as soon as I did, a short guy in a beanie suddenly looked away, finding interest in the shelf of religious books next to him. I smirked slightly, and looked back down at my book.

But after a while, I got the same feeling again. I looked up to see him do the same thing; although, after a few seconds, he approached me. Wow, he really was a shorty. In a cute way, though.

"That book you're reading, what do you think of it? I've been looking at it for a while myself," he said. My eyes widened slightly. He had a nice voice.

"Uh, well, I just started reading it, but I'm loving it so far. But this is written by my favorite author, and I love everything they write, so I already knew it would be good," I said, nervously laughing.

"Hm," he replied, sitting in a chair a few feet away from me. If I looked out of the corner of my eye, I could see his face without turning my head. He couldn't have been too much older than me, and wore a beanie low on his forehead. I was unable to see his hair, and could only tell what color it was by his unusually thin, black eyebrows. He had a slight scowl on his face, though it didn't really mar his appearance. And he looked exhausted. I looked back down at my book, continuing to read. I got the feeling he probably glanced at me a few more times, but I ignored it. Several minutes later, Armin approached me, holding four books of his own.

"Are you ready to go?" he asked me. I got up.

"Yes!" I said. We went to the checkout counter and I set mine down on the counter beside Armin's. In a few minutes, we were ready to go, and got in the car.

"What did you find?" I asked Armin as he was driving.

"Just some more biology stuff. And I see you found what you were looking for," he said, "How is it?"

"It's great as usual so far, but it seems more sad than usual. I mean, Ackerman's books are usually a little sad, but there's just something different about this one. I don't know, I could be imagining it and it's the same as the others," I said.

"What's with that guy always writing depressing stuff?" he asked. I looked at him indignantly.

"It's not depressing; also, no one knows if it's a guy or not," I said.

"You know, you could meet them someday and not even know it," he said, obviously trying to get on my nerves.

"I know, you don't have to remind me," I said, trying to glare at him, but failing and laughing instead. I never could glare at people.

In a few minutes, Armin pulled up to my house.

"Thanks for the ride, I'll see you soon!" I said, getting out and rushing into the house. I went straight to my room, eager to finish this book. Stopping only for dinner, I finished it a little past one in the morning. I was right; it was more sad than usual. Or, not really sad, but bittersweet. Although the story had a 'happy' ending, the overall tone was still kind of lonely.

It was set, at least in the very beginning of the book, in the year 825. It was about a young boy who was raised by a man he met when he was young. He lived in a slum in a large city, and always had dreamt of moving somewhere more rural, that wasn't so crowded. He had learned to steal to get food, and had a couple of friends that lived with him as he got older and when he didn't live with the older man anymore. Those three shared money and food. And to forget his rough lifestyle, he would always write stories.

He developed tiny handwriting so that he could use paper as efficiently as possible, and he always hid his stories. Over the years, these notebooks accumulated quickly, but he didn't want to get rid of them. But one day, his two best friends found them. They were furious, since all of the money spent on paper could have been spent on food. (In these days, paper was more expensive than it was today.) They claimed that he had been hiding money from them, though he wasn't.

They kicked him out. He believed they were always true friends, though the need for food to keep starvation at bay was just more important. He wandered the streets, sometimes sacrificing eating for money to get more paper. Writing became his one passion and need. When he wrote, he could take himself away to a life where nothing was going wrong. This led to a decline in his health, and he often shut himself away in isolated parts of the streets, hiding from everything.

Eventually, he made enough money to move out of the slum. He even secured a job, and made friends. He continued to write, all the time. This was the 'happy' ending. However, it seemed that despite escaping poverty and gaining friends, he was still always lonely.

I sighed, and layed down on my back. Ackerman's books always made me think long after I've read them, and I knew that this would be one of those that sticks for a very long time. Why was he still lonely after he got what he wanted? I spent a while laying on my bed, just mulling over the story.

After a while, my mind drifted to other things. Such as the beanie guy from the store. Was he really just interested in the book, or was he staring at me? Probably just the book, but I could always imagine. Honestly, he was pretty cute. But I knew it was pointless to think about that. I met him at a bookstore, what are the chances I'd see him again? Well, he might go there regularly, actually. But still.

Wow, I really am desperate. I met a stranger who was attractive, whose name I don't even know, and I'm thinking about seeing him again. It was probably because of the fact that I've only dated a few people ever before, since there weren't exactly a lot of guys where I lived who were both gay and attractive to me. I decided to brush this off, and just focus on other things that were more important.

I got up, and went to my desk. I pulled out my homework for the night, and got started on that. We had already taken our exams, but a few of my teachers still assigned us pointless busywork anyway to keep us 'academically focused.' This, along with my procrastination and eagerness to graduate, was very annoying to me. But I got it all done by around 2:30, and went to bed.

Although I knew I would feel the effects of being up this late tomorrow, I didn't care. I would stay up as late as I needed if it was for my favorite author. I went to bed, dreaming of that story.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is written in Levi's point of view. I plan for every chapter to alternate between them, unless there are any exceptions.

I pulled out a plate from my cabinet, and put a muffin on it. I never used to eat breakfast, but my new medicine was required to be taken with food. It sucked ass, but it was necessary.

I opened the pill bottle and took out a single pill, putting it on the center of my tongue. I quickly gulped down some tea, swallowing the large pill along with it. I was just glad I only had to take those once a week. Besides, they were better than the alternate popular option. Having tubes stuck in my arms sounded much worse to me.

I ate my muffin and finished my tea. In a few minutes, I'd have to be going to the cancer center to get a checkup. They weren't as bad as I had initially expected them to be; my medical oncologist, Petra, always told me the truth bluntly. She never sugar-coated anything, but despite this, she was very sweet and kind. I liked her a lot.

Before I got dressed, I stood in front of the mirror, surveying my body. It had changed quite a bit in just the past several weeks. In my opinion, I looked like shit. Overall, I was smaller, a result of quite a bit of weight loss. I used to be pretty muscular, but now, I seemed to be made purely of pale skin and thin bones. I actually hadn't had too much trouble with vomiting, but it still happened occasionally. I definitely had lost my appetite. Tea was still irresistible to me, but eating was something I'd started viewing as a chore. Just something I had to get done.

My skin was peppered with bruises as well. I sighed at the sight; I looked pathetic. Though my appearance certainly wasn't the most important priority of mine, I still wanted to at least look like my old self. But right now, I looked helpless: thin, fragile, bruising at the simplest touch.

And then there was, of course, the most eye-catching feature of my ailing body: I didn't have hair. Or, rather, I did, but it was so short and much too uneven and thin to really count as normal hair. Even my eyebrows had thinned out a lot; though luckily, they were still barely visible. Only about a month ago, I'd had a sharp undercut on my head. Now, I just wore a beanie whenever I was out in public or around most people. Only Hanji was ever allowed to see me without it. Even Isabel, my best friend who was only second to Hanji, had never seen me without it. I wasn't planning on letting anyone else see anytime soon.

My long train of thought continued as I put on my clothes. Soon, I was ready to leave. I grabbed my bag that held my ever-present notebook, and got in the car.

When I got there, I checked in, and as I waited, I got out my notebook and started writing. Even though my last book had been released just a few days ago, I wanted to start on my next one already. Hanji, my editor and friend, was always reminding me to take breaks from writing. But something she could just never seem to fully grasp, despite my many frustrated explanations, was that writing was what I _loved_. It was my job, too, but I would still be doing it even if I didn't get paid for it. I didn't need too many breaks. It was what had always, and still does, distract me from everything going wrong.

Just then, my thoughts were interrupted.

"Levi Ackerman?" a young lady called, her head poking out from behind a door. I stood up, and followed her down the hall. She led me to my room, and went back to the counter in the waiting room. I stepped inside, and saw my oncologist turn around.

"Hey Levi!" Petra said with a welcoming smile.

"Hello," I said quietly, sitting in the other chair in the room. I wasn't looking forward to getting blood drawn. She seemed to sense exactly why I was slightly tense.

"Don't worry, we'll get the blood over with right now and then we can move on," she said.

"I'm not worrying," I grumbled. She smiled, not completely believing me, and wrapped a tourniquet around my upper arm. She then put gloves on, and gently cleaned my arm with a cotton ball dipped in alcohol. At this point, I closed my eyes. Strangely enough, I was perfectly fine with blood, just not needles themselves. I felt a quick prick, and held my breath. Soon, the tourniquet fell from my arm, and Petra handed me a cotton ball to keep pressed over the wound. After a few minutes, she put a bandage over it.

"I'm going to send this off to the lab, and I'll call you when we get the results. Call me if you have any questions."

"Okay." Oncologists here weren't supposed to call patients for anything more than informing them of results coming in, since answering questions over the phone kept them from coming to the center as soon, but Petra had given me her personal number. Why was she so nice to me? Tch, who knows. Maybe she likes me? I smirked, holding back a chuckle. Girls weren't appealing to me in that way, but only a select few people knew that.

Petra left the room to turn in the blood, and soon returned. She sat down at the seat beside her computer.

"So, Levi, any change in symptoms since last time?" she asked. Hm, I can't stand eating, I'm losing my hair, am tired all the time, and have about ten more bruises than a normal person should have. Nope, same as always.

"No, just the same things it has been," I said.

"That's good, if you experience any changes, don't hesitate to tell me. I won't be able to see how the chemotherapy is working until we get the bloodwork back; when we do I'll see if there's been a decrease in leukemia cells. If there is, you'll continue with the pills, but if not, I'd advise switching to either intramuscular or intravenous medication. Also, your cycle will be ending after next week, so you'll get a break for a little bit," she said. Fucking finally.

"Thank you," I said. I was eager to leave; Hanji and I were meeting up at the little cafe we went to almost every day. This was where we did our work. I would write, and she would edit and give me ideas. Though, her being my best friend always led to us having other conversations as well. Petra finished typing, and stood up.

"Make sure you don't stand up for too long for a few hours, and go get something to eat," she told me.

"I know, I know. Thank you Petra," I said, leaving the room. The two girls at the check-in counter told me bye as I left.

I got in the car, and started driving to the cafe. My phone buzzed against the passenger seat. Probably a text from Hanji. When I stopped at a red traffic light, I picked up my phone, and sure enough, it was from her. She had sent me a close-up, blurry picture of her eye, with no explanation. I snorted. I had expected something like that, coming from her. The weirdo.

About ten minutes later, I arrived in the parking lot of the shopping center where the cafe was. I got out of the car, and started walking to the cafe. The bookstore was also near here, and I came there sometimes to see how people reacted to my books. I would lurk around near either the front, where the new books were, or in the fiction section, close to my older books. I usually didn't ask people what they thought, in case a worker noticed a pattern and got suspicious, but I made an exception occasionally.

A few days ago I did this, actually. A tall kid who looked like a teenager had picked up a copy of my book, and sat down and started reading it. I couldn't help but notice his expression. When he picked up the book, he held it carefully, only touching it with the very tips of his fingers. And he had had such a wide smile; it looked as if he was barely keeping himself from giggling. I'd never seen someone react quite like this before, so I waited around a for a while, trying to be discreet with my glances towards him.

So I asked him how the book was, and he said he loved it, and that it was written by his favorite author. I actually had to contain a small smile at that; it made me happy when people enjoy my work.

I stepped into the cafe, and scanned the room for Hanji. Someone had taken our usual secluded spot, so I went over to where she was. She'd chosen a booth far away from any taken spaces, so no one would overhear us easily. She was reading something, but closed her book when I sat down.

"Hey there, Little Ravioli, how'd the appointment go?" she asked cheerfully. She'd given me that nickname a couple years ago, the 'ravioli' part coming from a certain very memorable incident involving a can of it, and the 'little' coming from... Well, that part was obvious.

"It went well, I'm not dead yet," I said dryly. She gave me a look.

"And you're not going to be," she said sternly. I rolled my eyes; she always took my jokes too seriously. I pulled out my bag that contained several notebooks and a multitude of different colored pens, along with a few mechanical pencils. The pencils were for me, the pens for Hanji and her editing prowess. I know typing everything on a computer would be faster, but I much preferred writing by hand.

"I'm only just thinking of ideas right now, so help me with that," I said. "Here's what I've come up with so far." I slid a notebook over to her, open to a page with a short list on it. After she read the list, she looked thoughtful for a minute.

"You know, Levi, you should try something new," she said.

"What do you mean?" I asked. She smiled her characteristic Hanji-grin, the one that suggested she was thinking perverted thoughts. As if she wasn't doing that constantly.

Before she could answer, her phone vibrated, and she pulled it out of her pocket. She answered it.

"Erwin! What's up?" she asked. Erwin was a long-time friend to both of us. There was a brief pause before she spoke again.

"I am, and I'm pretty sure he is. He's sitting right here, let me ask him real quick." She lowered the phone. "Are you available this Friday night coming up?" she asked me.

"Yeah," I said, with a curious tone. She put the phone back up to her ear.

"Yes he is!" she said happily. After about a minute, she put her phone down again.

"He wants to know if we can come to the Shiganshina High School graduation," she said to me.

"Oh, sure." She conveyed the message to Erwin that we'd both be coming. Erwin was the Navy JROTC instructor at the school, and he always came to graduations to see his students off. He used to be a commander, but now took great pride in helping the kids develop their skills. With most of them, they'd enter the program as whiny little kids, and leave as new, more mature people. He told us about them all the time.

"I can't wait! We'll see you there, bye Erwin," Hanji said, hanging up. We resumed looking at ideas for my next story.

"What I was _going_ to say earlier was that you should include romance," she said.

"Are you kidding? I have no experience with that sort of stuff," I said, "Besides, people might not want a sudden change in how I write." She shook her head.

"Levi, if you listened to what the fans say, you'd know that they'd be happy with anything you write. Also, it wouldn't be a change in how you write, just in what you write about. It wouldn't even have to be the main focus of the story." I crossed my arms.

"I do listen to what they say. And still, I have no experience with that sort of thing." It was true, it had been a long time since I was in a relationship. I wouldn't have any idea how to write about it.

"Well, I won't make you, but if you ever feel like trying something different, that's my suggestion." We went back to discussing my previous ideas for a few hours. Once it was close to dinner time, we parted ways, and I headed back home.

I soon found myself looking forward to the graduation quite a bit. I enjoyed outings with Hanji and Erwin, and for the next few days, I eagerly waited for the graduation.


	3. Chapter 3

I looked at myself in the mirror, admiring my graduation gown, which was a beautiful dark green with a gold collar. I had a red, white, and blue cord hanging around my neck, to show my membership of the Navy JROTC at school.

I ended up in the elective class when I was a freshman not by choice, but because freshmen had the least priority for guidance counselers about class choices. They put me in the class, and I decided to stay in it for the rest of high school. I had learned a lot, and made friends in it. My instructor, Commander Erwin Smith, was a veteran of the Navy, and though he was strict, he was definitely my favorite "teacher." It feels weird to call him that, though. I wasn't planning on joining the military after high school, but we did quite a bit of other things in the program as well, and I enjoyed it. I was planning on seeing him after the ceremony; he told us he'd be there.

Graduation was going to start in two hours, and I was jittery with excitement. Mikasa and I were going to leave soon to meet up with Armin. I grabbed my graduation cap, and walked into the living room. Mom was in there, telling Mikasa how proud she was and looking at her graduation gown. Dad wasn't there; he'd been on a business trip for a week now. Earlier, I had been disappointed he couldn't come, but today, nothing could bring my mood down. When Mom saw me, she rushed over.

"Eren, I'm so proud of you!" she gushed happily. She looked as if she was almost in tears.

"Graduating isn't hard though, all you have to do is not fail your classes and get decent grades," I said, laughing.

"But you two are growing up! Your university is close by, so no excuses to not come over here sometimes," she said, "I'll miss you so much!" She hugged me, then Mikasa.

"We'll miss you too," Mikasa said. She usually didn't display much affection towards people, but our parents were the exception. And me too, occasionally.

"I'll be there about ten minutes before it starts. You two go ahead!" she said. Mikasa and I went to my car, and I drove to the school. I recognized Armin's car pulling into the parking lot at the same time as us, and parked beside him.

As we got out, we saw Armin with a gold sash around his neck. He held a folded piece of paper tightly, and looked very nervous.

"Hi Armin!" I said, nearly trembling from excitement. He smiled when he saw us.

"Hi," he said. He must be more anxious than I thought.

"Don't be so nervous! It'll go fine," I said.

"I really don't want to give this speech," he said.

"At least yours is shorter than the other one! Pretend you're only talking to us," I said. Armin had gotten the position of salutatorian, which meant he had to give a speech at the end of the ceremony. His grades throughout high school had been absolutely impeccable; and my guess is that the only reason he didn't get valedictorian was because of his lack of extra-curricular activities. GPA was the main factor selecting the positions though. My grades had been moderately good, but not anywhere near his.

"Guys, we should probably go to the gym now," Mikasa said. The seniors were meeting up at the gym to line up, and then we would walk out to the football field where all of the chairs and the stage were set up.

The three of us went down to the gym, where a huge, noisy throng of people was gathered. We waited in the least crowded place we could find until an administrator started speaking into a microphone.

"Please be quiet. We're going to try to form the line as quickly as possible, so please listen. When we call your name, go up to the line and stand where you're told. There are other administrators up there, so ask them if you need help," he said.

He started calling off names, a slow but effective process. Armin was at the very front, beside the valedictorian, and Mikasa was several rows back from the front. I was two rows behind her. We were standing in twos, forming a very long line. The way we were arranged was in order of achievement. The most decorated people, with high grades and extra cords, were all up at the front. The middle, which is where Mikasa and I were, was full of people with a few decorations. Those at the end didn't have anything. By the time they finished, it was almost time for the ceremony to start.

We started walking outside. I relished the feeling, knowing that there would only be one other time in my life I'd ever do this. But this was the last time I'd be with all these people, some I knew, some I didn't.

Soon, we had reached the field, and we filed into our seats. I could see Mikasa sitting three seats away from me, and Armin sitting on a chair on the stage. He was scanning the rows of seats for us, and when he saw us, I gave him a smile. I hoped he wasn't too anxious about the speech; I wanted him to enjoy the ceremony too.

I looked around. The band was sitting to the right of the graduation stage, sitting calmly. A few of them waved at the band seniors sitting in the rows. I looked up at the bleachers, through the audience, hoping to find people I knew. I spotted my mother. We made eye contact, and she waved at me. I continued looking for a little bit, and saw Commander Smith. He was sitting in one of the rows closer to the ground. As I looked around, I noticed something odd. Beside him, there was a guy who was wearing a beanie. At first, I didn't pay any attention to it. But then I did a double take. Was that the same guy I saw in the bookstore? I couldn't tell for sure, since he was far away, and I had only seen him once before.

A few minutes later, the principal of our school got up, and stood at the podium.

"Thank you all for coming to this night of celebration. These students here have worked hard to earn these seats, and we congratulate them for that achievement." The principal droned on like this for a while, repeating the same thing over and over but in different words. Why can't they just get to the actual graduating part?

After a while, the valedictorian gave her speech. It was a moderate length and heartfelt, and it seemed to captivate everyone in the audience. But I knew that Armin's speech would be even better. He'd gone over it, revised it, and practiced it so many times; all three of us probably had it memorized by now. Armin wouldn't be speaking until the ceremony was almost over.

Suddenly, I heard the beginning of Pomp and Circumstance. The band had begun playing, and the first row of students was lining up next to the stage. They each got their diploma, and shook the hands of several people standing at the front. Before long, my row stood. We steadily moved forward, inching closer to the stage.

I was sweating from excitement. This was the moment that all of high school had led up to. I was going to be out of high school and a college student instead. The slow, stately music of the band made me feel exhilarated, making my heart pound even more. This was when everything sank in. This was real. I was actually graduating, moving on the the adult part of my life. Mikasa and I would be moving into our own apartment, living by ourselves. It felt like my mind was thinking of everything so quickly, as if I didn't know any of this was happening until right now. All of my emotions felt unnaturally heightened and exaggerated.

Finally, I stepped onto the stage. I watched the person in front of me shake hands, then get handed his diploma. As he stepped off, I walked up to the principal.

"Congratulations," he said, then shook my hand. I shook the hand of two other people up there too, most likely members of the county school board. The last person on the stage handed me my diploma. When that paper was put in my hand, I smiled a stupid, silly, grin, one that quite a few other people were wearing as well.

As I walked off the stage and back to my seat, I got out of the order of the line so that I could sit beside my sister. She was smiling too, which I didn't see all that often. I held up my hand, and she looked at me confusedly.

"High-five," I said. She looked at me blankly for a second, then shook her head and clapped her hand against mine. I sat back in my seat and laughed. She glared at me, and I quieted down.

Around forty-five minutes later, the last person was stepping down from the stage, and the band's song ended with a final chord. Armin got up, and I gave him an encouraging smile. He was looking straight at Mikasa and I, and his eyes never strayed once. He was probably still internally nervous, but he definitely didn't show it. It looked as if he had a newfound confidence. He walked up to the podium and placed his paper on it.

"Everyone here has come because of some kind of change. For many of us," he said, gesturing to the students, "it is the transition from high school to adulthood. Whether adulthood consists of college, the military, or going straight into a career, it is a turning point in our lives. For others, the change may be a house becoming empty, or a friend or child moving away. But whatever the change is, this will be the last night before it is all different. Right now, this is the last time that every one of the people here will all be together. For many of you, who are even friends, this might be your last time seeing each other.

"When many of us were young, we were told to not try to grow up too quickly, and to enjoy our time before we become adults. Of course, most people didn't listen to that. And in truth, I never really listened to that either until recently. It's hard to know how fast time goes by until you're about to leave something you've known for years. But I now realize that, and I hope that you all do too. So go on to whatever the future holds for you, and try to make the best of it. And don't forget your time here." Armin went back to his seat.

The audience burst with applause. His speech went even better than I had expected. I looked at Armin, who was now sitting down, sweating slightly. He was smiling, and seemed much happier now that it was over.

The valedictorian and Armin were handed their diplomas, and shook the hands of the principal and school board members. The graduation was over.

Everyone got up to go find their family members. Armin ran over to us.

"You did so great! You sounded really confident," I said.

"Thank you! I'm glad I got it over with," he said. Mikasa congratulated him as well, then we started walking to the bleachers. My mom rushed over to us. She gave all three of us a hug, and tried to kiss us, at which point, I pushed her away from embarrassment.

"I'm going to go over there to see Commander," I said, pointing.

"All right, come back here when you're done," she said. I nodded, and hurried over to the blonde man standing in the bleachers, surrounded by senior JROTC members: Jean, Marco, Annie, Ymir, Krista, Reiner, Bertholdt, Connie, and Sasha.

"Eren! Congratulations," he said, shaking my hand.

"Thank you, sir." As the other graduates started dissipating, I noticed two people who had been standing beside Commander the whole time. A lady I'd never seen before, and a short, grumpy-looking man who I most certainly recognized.

It was the beanie guy from the bookstore. Damn, was he cute.

"What are you staring at, kid?" he asked. I looked away with a start, my face starting to burn. The lady beside him started giggling, in a strange, maniacal way.

"Don't worry, Little Ravioli here always looks grumpy," she said to me, "but he's actually only grumpy most of the time."

Little Ravioli? I desperately tried holding back a smile, but couldn't. He glared at me, and I flinched back a little. He was attractive, but in an intimidating type of way.

"Now Levi, don't be rude to strangers," she said teasingly.

"Shut up, shitty glasses."

Oh, his voice. It was deep and rough, and I don't think I've ever heard something so beautiful. And his name must be Levi. I don't know if I liked the sound of it so much just because of the name itself, or because it belongs to him. Probably the second one.

"Sorry, Eren. These two are a handful," Commander Smith said apologetically. God, Levi here was making me hard from his glare. Who knew such a thing was even possible? I needed to get away before anything more embarrassing happened.

"It's fine, Commander; I have to go see my mom, bye!" My voice cracked as I said this. That was humiliating. And why did I have to specify my mom? Now I was even more embarrassed. Ugh, this guy was making me so flustered. I clumsily fast-walked over to my mom, who was waiting with Armin and Mikasa.

"Are you okay?" Armin asked. He looked concerned.

"Yeah! Let's go eat," I said, trying to brush off my mixed feelings of embarrassment, happiness, and a third emotion; one that I only seemed to have whenever I thought of Levi.


	4. Chapter 4

I entered the cafe, immediately heading towards Hanji. She was sitting in our usual spot, away from most of the other people.

"Hey Levi," she said, wearing her sly Hanji-grin. Well, that's never good.

"What are you making that face for?" I snapped. I sat across from her in the booth, crossing my arms.

"Ooh, aren't you moody today," she said teasingly.

"Just tell me what you're thinking about that's making you look so creepy. I can tell it's something," I said. Hanji tapped her fingers against the table, probably savoring the suspense of taking her time not to tell me. After a moment, she spoke.

"Who was that cutie at the graduation, hm?" She grinned mischievously. Now why the hell did she have to bring him up?

"No one, just a kid I saw at the bookstore a while ago. He was reading my last book, and looked really happy about it, so I asked him what he thought. I didn't know he'd be at the graduation."

"He seemed really happy to see you. Did you see how he was blushing? So cute!"

God damn it, I could feel myself starting to turn red ever so slightly. I had to admit, the kid- Eren, was it?- was... not unnatractive. I mean, he had looked at me with those big green eyes, and he had the brightest smile I've seen in a long while. Most people would find that attractive. However, that little opinion was one I planned to keep to myself.

"Tch, stupid teenagers." She looked at me knowingly.

"Do you like him?" she asked. I glared at her harshly. At least, more harshly than usual.

"I don't even know his last name; you think I like every guy I speak to," I said irritably. "I've seen him a total of two times, Hanji. Two."

"Oh, Levi. Are you ever planning on finding love?" she asked. "And no tough guy answers. I'm serious." I rolled my eyes. Why was she so interested in my love life, or lack thereof?

"Who do you think would be interested in a somewhat bald, old, asshole like me? I'd feel bad for them," I said, laughing a little at the self-deprecating statement. I tugged on my beanie, making sure it was still in place.

"First of all, your hair will grow back; thirty-four is not old; and... I kind of have to agree with the asshole part. But only kind of. Once anyone gets to know you well they realize that you're really a kind person. Also, anyone who becomes disinterested in you purely for any of those reasons, probably wasn't a good person for you in the first place. Second of all, as for who would be interested in you? Both you and I already know of someone who's interested in you." I hated to admit it, but all of her points were valid.

"Wow, Hanji, when did you turn into my romantic advisor?" I said sarcastically. She grinned.

"Well, I would've become your romantic advisor long ago had you not avoided any and all chances to find yourself a man," she said. I pulled my notebook out of my bag.

"Shut up, we're wasting time talking about this. We need to get to work."

"But we're ahead. In fact, next week is when you're scheduled to start planning your next book."

"How many times must I tell you: I write for myself, and I view those schedules as deadlines, not as guidelines. I'll get as far ahead as I want."

She gave in with a shrug and motioned for me to hand her a pen, which I did.

"So, my Little Ravioli, have any inspiring, ingenious, and thought-provoking ideas yet?"

"Actually, yes." She looked at me in surprise.

"Tell me about it."

"What if I write a fantasy story this time? You said something about trying something different, and I'm sure as hell not doing romance."

"I wasn't expecting you to actually listen to me!" she said, sounding very happy. "I think it's a really good idea. Do you have anything specific in mind?"

"Vaguely," I said.

"All stories start out as vague ideas. Tell me what you've got."

"Well, I was thinking about a post-apocalyptic world, but in the past, instead of in the future like everyone else does. I haven't come up with a reason for it yet, but that's the idea." Hanji looked thoughtful.

"When in the past?"

"I'm not sure yet." Hanji smiled, and reached over the table to attempt to poke my cheek. I moved her hand away from my face.

"Don't touch my face, and what do you think?" I asked.

"I think that it could be a very good idea, as long as we come up with the right details. Let's just work from big to small. So try thinking of things like, 'What happened to make the world the way it is now? How many people are left? Are they spread out everywhere, or are they all in one place? Can they fix whatever happened or is the damage permanent? Is there something out to get them, or is the danger only in them just trying to survive?' I'll tell you if I come up with anything," she said.

"Thank you, Hanji. I'm thirsty, do you want anything to drink?"

"Nah, I'm fine. You go get something." I got up, and walked up to the counter. I ordered some tea, and payed in cash. When the boy at the register handed me change, I dropped a quarter.

As I leaned down to pick it up, I saw another hand reaching for it. The person behind me in line had tried to pick it up. His hand reached the coin before mine, and I accidentally made eye contact with him.

How green those eyes were.

I stood back up, my heart pounding at the sudden shock of recognizing him. He handed the quarter to me, his hand lightly brushing against mine as he did, making my heart pound even more. His face was looking down at me innocently. Yes, down at me. The damned kid was maybe a good four inches taller than me.

"Levi?" he said.

"What is it, kid? And thank you," I said. He ordered some coffee, and I waited for him near the counter.

"Uh... I just wanted to tell you hi," he said nervously. His face was quickly beginning to redden. "Anyway, I have to go, bye!" I stared after him in confusion as he left the cafe. What a weirdo. I shouldn't be surprised though; I seemed to be a magnet for those.

I walked back to Hanji and sat down. She was on her laptop, though she had been watching the exchange between Eren and I. As expected, she was holding back laughter, resulting in a constipated-looking face.

"Just shut up," I said tiredly. Her shoulders shook for a few moments more, and finally stilled.

"Sorry Levi, that was just too adorable. But anyway," she said, "You got an interview request." My scowl softened at that.

"Online, right?" I asked. I refused to do anything tied to my literary career in person.

"Yes. In fact, they sent the questions along, so you can answer them now if you want. There are only a few." A smile tugged at the edge of my lips, and I turned the computer around, pulling it towards me. I actually enjoyed doing interviews, though I didn't do them very often. I didn't want to reveal too much information about myself. The magazines had quickly learned that I was completely unwilling to do any sort of interview that was done in person, so it became common knowledge among the press that if anyone wanted information from me, they'd have to email my editor an interview in questionnaire format. Of course, only some of them received replies. I ignored the ones that were too pushy about finding out who I am.

I knew I had some very dedicated fans out there, and that they'd jump at the chance to learn more about me. I smirked, thinking about Eren. He'd certainly be one of them.

Oh Eren, you probably dream of meeting me someday. But I'm right here.

I read the questions on the screen.

_1\. Where do you get the ideas for your books?_

_2\. Why do you choose not to reveal your identity to the public?_

_3\. In what ways have your life experiences affected your writing?_

_4\. Are all of your characters completely made up, or do you write people into your stories?_

_5\. Many readers say that your stories have a melancholy mood. What do you think?_

_6\. How often do you write? Do you have specific times of day to work on your books?_

_7\. What is your purpose for writing? Why did you choose writing as a career?_

_8\. What are your plans for any future books?_

_9\. How does your romantic life affect your stories?_

_10\. What motivates you to keep writing?_

Only ten questions, this should be pretty easy.

Number one: Where do I get the ideas for my books? Well, they're usually a mix of my own experiences with fiction. The fiction just comes out of nowhere. _"My ideas are usually a mixture of my own experiences with fiction. It's mostly fiction, though. I don't know where I get the ideas from, they just seem to come out of nowhere all of the sudden, then develop over time."_

Number two: Why don't I reveal my identity to the public? Hah, I don't want strangers coming up to me and talking to me. I don't want to see my picture in magazines and the news. And if they found out I had leukemia, I definitely would not need a million sympathy cards from people I don't know stuffed in my mailbox. _"I prefer to keep my personal life separate from the knowledge of the general public."_

Number three: In what ways have my life experiences affected my writing? Well, they caused me to start writing. I admit, in my last book, the aspect of the kid starting to write stories because of his bad circumstances was taken from my own life. _"The main way they affected my writing was by causing me to start writing when I was younger."_

Number four: Do I write people into my stories? Yes. Oh, yes. Very much so. _"Only if I have their explicit permission. I plan my characters beforehand, and if my friends still beg to be in the story, I'll put them in the role that best suites them. Of course, their names are different."_

Number five: Do my stories have a melancholy mood? Hm, some of them certainly do. _"That's probably dependent upon the reader, but I can see where the idea comes from."_

Number six: How often do I write, and do I have specific times when I write? This one's easy. _"I write throughout most of the day, when I have free time. But I usually meet with my editor around the same time every day."_

Number seven: What is my purpose for writing, and why did I choose it as a career? Well, I've always had things going wrong in my life, and writing took me away from it temporarily. _"I write because it always makes me feel better about bad circumstances, and it is my career because I didn't go to college, and writing requires no degree. But mainly because it is what I love to do."_

Number eight: What are my plans for future books? Oh, I had just been thinking about this. _"I'm considering doing a fantasy novel for the first time, but it's still in the planning stage, so it's only a possibility right now."_

Number nine: How does my (nonexistent) romantic life affect my stories? _"Wow, poorly disguised 'Are you dating anyone?' question. And to satisfy people from this apparently important question, no, I'm not dating anyone at the moment."_

Number ten: What motivates me to keep writing? Again, the shit in my life. And the money, but mostly the shit in my life.   _"Things not going well are always good to get me writing. I seem to write the best when things are going the worst."_

I flipped the computer back around, pushing it towards Hanji. She read over my answers, and sent them in. I smiled very slightly, imagining what Eren's reaction might be when he read the interview. Of course, not all of my answers weren't completely honest, but for the most part, they were true.

I soon found myself secretly hoping to run into Eren again, much more than I should have.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things will finally start to pick up in the next chapter!

I heaved one end of a twin bed off the ground. Mikasa carried the other end, and my dad was holding onto one of the sides. We flipped it over on its side so we could fit it through the door, and made it through. Finally, we got to the bedroom, and set it down. It wasn't parallel to the wall, but none of us could care less. After we repeated the painful process with the other bed, we had finished moving all of the large furniture.

"Thank you Dad," I said. I didn't know moving was so difficult. Even getting the apartment itself was time-consuming, and since we were moving the furniture ourselves, the paperwork had not been the end of our labor.

"You're welcome. You two call me if there's any trouble," he said, turning to leave to return the moving truck.

All of our smaller possessions were in boxes, stacked in the living room. We soon started sorting through them, moving them to the room in which they were supposed to go. Our new apartment was pretty small, but it would be good for Mikasa and I. We had decided that lots of space wasn't too important, as long as there was at least enough.

After I'd gotten all of my boxes in my room, I started unpacking them. Of course, the first thing I started on was my boxes of books. I had a very large bookcase, and was grateful at the chance to go through all of my books again and rearrange them. I got all of my books out and layed them on the floor, some of them in stacks to leave room for me and the remaining boxes.

I got all of Ackerman's books, and put them in alphabetical order on the shelf that was just under eye level for me. Beside them went all of the magazines I had that featured interviews with them, and then on the opposite side of the shelf, on the same level, I put magazines with interviews from other authors that I liked. All of the other compartments were arranged by category of book, and then by author and alphabetical order. I'm actually not a very organized person, but when it comes to my books, they are the exception. My favorites went closest to eye level or just under, and ones I wasn't likely to reread in the near future we placed near either the top or bottom.

After I finished that, I took a picture of my glorious bookcase, and sent it to Armin. He called me soon after.

"Hey Armin," I said, as I put away smaller items in my nightstand.

"Hi Eren, did you get done with everything? I like the bookcase, by the way, it looks good." I smiled. I knew it did.

"I still have a few boxes left, but I'm almost done. I'm not sure how Mikasa's doing, but she's probably done already. Do you want to come over and see?"

"I'd love to, I was actually hoping to see you today; I've got something you might like." I could hear a slight smile in his voice, and I wondered what he was talking about. I gave him our new address.

"I'll be there in a few minutes, bye!" Armin hung up. He seemed excited about something, but I didn't know what. I figured I should probably tell Mikasa he was coming over, so I put away the remaining items, then went to her room and knocked on the door. She opened it, and, as I had expected, her room didn't have any hint that she had only just moved in that morning.

"What is it?" she asked.

"Armin is coming over in a few minutes, just so you know."

"Sounds good. Also, Eren," she said, "We need to get jobs soon."

"By when?"

"That doesn't matter, just be on the lookout for job applications. I'll be doing the same."

"Okay."

"One more thing," she said, her expression changing, "Are you all right?"

"Yeah, why do you ask?"

"You've just seemed a little distracted sometimes lately, more than usual." I gulped. Why was she so perceptive? Okay, I had a crush on someone, but did it really show enough for her to pick up on it? She was looking at me closely, as if she was examining any slight change in my expression and analyzing what it might mean.

"U-uh, I don't know. I guess I'm just nervous about everything changing in the next few months," I said, knowing fully well she wouldn't go along with it. I could feel my ears turning red, and looked at the floor in shame. Only she and my parents knew the little trick of how to tell if I was lying or not, and unfortunately, I'd never grown out of it since I was little.

"Really," she said, obviously not even pretending to believe me.

"Yeah-" I started, but luckily, the doorbell rang just then, saving me.

"I'll get it!" I said, rushing to the door to greet my savior. I opened it and let Armin in. He glanced around, looking at the living room and kitchen that were visible at first step into the apartment.

"It's bigger than I expected," he said, "Show me your room!" I led him to my room, and he walked around, admiring everything.

"What was it you were going to show me?" I asked.

"Oh, I went to the bookstore today and found this, and I figured you'd like it. Since you haven't been talking about it, I thought maybe you didn't have it yet." He dug around in his bag and pulled out a magazine, handing it to me. On the cover was a headline in a bold, bright white font: "Interview with Ackerman." A smile spread on my face.

"I don't have it, I didn't even know they did another one! Thank you so much," I said. Ackerman's interviews were rare, so I read them whenever they were available. I sat down on my bed, and Armin sat beside me. I opened the magazine up to the page with the interview, and began reading.

_Interviewer: Where do you get the ideas for your books?_

_Ackerman: My ideas are usually a mixture of my own experiences and fiction. It's mostly fiction, though. I don't know where I get the ideas from, they just seem to come out of nowhere all of the sudden, then develop over time._

_Interviewer: Why do you choose not to reveal your identity to the public?_

_Ackerman: I prefer to keep my personal life separate from the knowledge of the general public._

"I just wish we could have a tiny bit of detail about them. They wouldn't have to give away their entire personal life," I said.

"They probably don't want people coming up to them when they're out in public," Armin said. I sighed.

"Still," I whined, "I want to know more than just their last name!"

_Interviewer: In what ways have your life experiences affected your writing?_

_Ackerman: The main way they affected my writing was by causing me to start writing when I was younger._

_Interviewer: Are all of your characters completely made up, or do you write people into your stories?_

_Ackerman: Only if I have their explicit permission. I plan my characters beforehand, and if my friends still beg to be in the story, I'll put them in the role that best suites them. Of course, their names are different._

_Interviewer: Many readers say that your stories have a melancholy mood. What do you think?_

_Ackerman: That's probably dependent upon the reader, but I can see where the idea comes from._

_Interviewer: How often do you write? Do you have specific times of day to work on your books?_

_Ackerman: I write throughout most of the day, when I have free time. But I usually meet with my editor around the same time every day._

_Interviewer: What is your purpose for writing? Why did you choose writing as a career?_

_Ackerman: I write because it always makes me feel better about bad circumstances, and it is my career because I didn't go to college, and writing requires no degree. But mainly because it is what I love to do._

_Interviewer: What are your plans for any future books?_

_Ackerman: I'm considering doing a fantasy novel for the first time, but it's still in the planning stage, so it's only a possibility right now._

_Interviewer: How does your romantic life affect your stories?_

_Ackerman: Wow, poorly disguised 'Are you dating anyone?' question. And to satisfy people from this apparently important question, no, I'm not dating anyone at the moment._

I laughed at this answer. Ackerman always gave irritated-sounding answers whenever interviewers asked them about their personal life.

But they said "at the moment," which must mean that they do date people. I briefly wondered if their dates knew that they were with a famous author.

_Interviewer: What motivates you to keep writing?_

_Ackerman: Things not going well are always good to get me writing. I seem to write the best when things are going the worst_.

That concluded the interview. It was short, but Ackerman's interviews were always conducted through email.

That last question, though, had sounded just like the protagonist from their last book. Ackerman had said that they sometimes wrote people into their stories, so maybe they were one of those people, writing theirself into their own story? Lots of authors do that, so it was likely. Either way, Ackerman's stories were beautiful.

Wait.

I just got an idea.

"Wow, they sound like an introvert," said Armin. I'd nearly forgotten he was sitting beside me.

"Yeah," I said, "Um, Armin, I have a question."

"Yes?"

"If you liked someone, but didn't know them very well, do you think a book would be a good gift? Or is that too much?" Armin seemed to catch on, smiling.

"I think it'd be a good gift. Who are you thinking about giving it to?" he asked. I could feel myself starting to blush. Should I tell him the truth? He's Armin, I can't lie to him.

"Uh... This guy I met at the bookstore a while ago. He was at graduation and I saw him at the cafe next to the bookstore last week. He said he had been looking at _To Write Yourself Away_ , and I told him about it. I don't think he bought it, until after we left, at least. He seemed like he wanted to read it, though." Maybe he couldn't afford it?

"Do you know his name yet?"

"Yes. Levi," I said, enjoying the sound of his name. God, this crush was weird.

"Well, a gift might be a good way to get to know him better. You should give him your number too, so he has a way to talk to you."

"Definitely! Thank you Armin," I said. He smiled.

"No problem."


	6. Chapter 6

I scrambled to a chair, and sat down. It was mid-morning, and I had been getting ready to go meet Hanji for work, but I had suddenly felt extremely light-headed. This wasn't so unusual, but it meant that it was time for a new blood transfusion. I had been feeling more tired than usual the past few days, but I knew that if I didn't get one at this point, I could easily pass out.

One of the main effects of leukemia was that it interfered with blood cell production. The lack of red blood cells would cause fatigue, and the lack of platelets would cause easy bruising and bleeding. If I let the fatigue go on for too long without getting a transfusion, I'd pass out. It fucking sucked.

I pulled out my phone. The first couple times this had happened, I'd taken too long thinking about who to contact. I had finally made the good decision of asking Hanji if she'd be the person to pick me up if I ever needed an emergency visit to the cancer center or the hospital, and she agreed. I had considered Isabel, but she works at that bookstore I sometimes visit which meant she couldn't leave at any given moment, and since Hanji just works with me, she would be available at any time. Isabel was second, in case Hanji was unable to come. I still felt bad, having to make my friends worry and drive me around whenever this type of thing happened, but it was safer than trying to drive when I might pass out.

I texted Hanji.

**Can you come pick me up? Feel like passing out.**

Soon, I got a reply: **I'll be there as soon as I can, hold on.**

I put on my shoes and beanie, and walked to the chair in my living room closest to the front door. My vision was starting to become tinged with purple, white, and black, and I felt as if I was half-asleep. The minutes went on, feeling like hours to me. My head soon felt warm, as if something hot was pressed around it. I knew there was only a matter of time before I was unconscious.

Finally, the door opened, and Hanji rushed in. I'd given her a key to my house just for this purpose. She put her arms around me, and with our combined efforts, I stood up. My limbs felt as if they were made of lead, but I could still move. She held an arm around my waist, making sure I made it to the car. I got in the seat beside her, and we started driving to the cancer center.

She said something, but I can't hear her at all. My hearing was muffled, as if someone had put earmuffs on me. I could hear her voice, but she sounded like she was standing at a distance. She took my hand, and squeezed it, saying something else, but I still couldn't understand her words.

Usually, I was out quickly, but this time it was taking a bit longer, which was good. Maybe we could make it to the cancer center before it happened.

I was barely cognizant of what was going on when we parked. She got out, then came over to my side, and helped me out. She kept her arm around my waist, and I walked forward with her blindly.

I remained half-awake, and wasn't able to really process what was going on until I saw a tube in my arm, filled with crimson liquid. I guess I had consented to the blood transfusion, but I could barely remember the past twenty minutes at all. I was just relieved I hadn't passed out.

Hanji was beside me, holding my hand. I drew my hand away.

"Thank you," I said. I really was grateful to have the friends I did, even if I didn't act like it most of the time.

"You're welcome," she said, smiling.

"We're still going to the cafe today, just so you know," I said. She chuckled, and shook her head. I supposed I've finally beaten it into her head that _nothing_ will stop me from writing.

"Whatever you say, Little Ravioli."

In a few minutes, Petra came in.

"Levi, how are you feeling? You seemed pretty out of it a while ago," she said.

"I'm much better now."

"Good. Next time you're really fatigued, though, you should come in before it gets to this point. That way, we won't have to worry about you passing out as well. Waiting too long will lead to that." Her voice was stern, but she didn't seem angry.

Once the bag was empty, Petra removed the tube, and put a bandage on my arm.

After a while, we were ready to leave, and I told Petra bye. We got back in the car, and went back to my house so that I could pick up my bag with my notebook in it. After that, we finally arrived at the cafe. It was about an hour later than usual, though we still had a lot of time.

We went to our usual table, and sat down. I pulled out my notebook, and reread the ideas I had come up with for the fantasy novel.

"I was thinking about making it in the same time period as the last book; maybe a little later. Maybe around 850 or something. Also, I thought of this idea for the 'post-apocalyptic' part. What if all of humanity that's left is inside a country surrounded by walls?"

"That's actually really interesting! Good idea. But why are the walls there?" she asked, looking thoughtful.

"I... don't know yet," I said. "I just liked the wall idea," I said, shrugging.

"That's still a good start," she said. Just then, she looked out towards the door of the cafe, with a very surprised expression. I turned around to try to see what she was looking at.

Fucking god, does that kid follow me around or something?

Eren had just walked into the cafe. However, instead of ordering something, he went up to the counter and said something to an employee. She walked into the kitchen, and came back with someone else. He then spoke to the other person, who handed him a piece of paper. I saw him walk to a table, and look at the paper. I realized he also had a small brown package that he set down on the table.

"Hanji, is he applying for a job here?" I asked.

"Looks like it. Maybe he's doing it just to watch you," she said. My face contorted at that.

"Ugh, no. If he wants to talk to me, then he should just come up to me, not stare at me from a distance. That's creepy as hell."

"Well, then you better go talk to him before he fills that thing out," she said, wearing an amused expression. I sighed.

"Fine." I stood up, and made my way over to where he was. Why was I getting nervous? He was just a kid, I didn't have any reason to be anxious. I brushed the feeling off, and approached his table, crossing my arms. The paper was, indeed, a job application.

He looked up from the paper, and his eyes immediately widened.

"Hey, brat. Are you applying here just to watch me? Because, if you are, that's really creepy. If you want to talk to me, just approach me. You won't be able to do that if you work here." His face turned pink at this.

"Uh, I was just applying here because I'm starting college soon, and I need the money. I know I saw you here before, but I didn't know you came regularly. And, um," he said, "I guess I was kind of hoping to see you today, I, uh..." He trailed off, sounding as if he wanted to say something else. I glared at him.

"You _were_ hoping to see me today?" I slid into a seat across from him. Damn, if he blushes any more, there won't be any blood left in the rest of his body.

"U-um, I just..." He took a deep breath. "I have something to give you. But first, you mean I can just come up to you and talk to you?" I rolled my eyes impatiently.

"Yeah, you don't have to be scared of me." He smiled, in a way that was a bit cute. What the hell was wrong with me? I barely knew the kid.

"Well, here you go," he said softly, handing me the small package. It felt like... a book?

"Do you want me to-" He nodded before I finished the sentence. I opened the paper with my fingers, and out slid a book with a note on the front.

The note read,

_Dear Levi,_

_You seemed interested in this when I saw you at the bookstore that one day, so I got a copy for you. It's a really amazing book, I hope you enjoy it. Also, if you would like to be friends, here is my number._

_Sincerely,_

_Eren Jaeger_

His phone number was written right above the word 'sincerely.' Before I could think too much about that, I pulled the note off, to see the book underneath.

And guess what book it was?

 _To Write Yourself Away_ , written by yours truly.

There was so much to think about, I just couldn't process it all. Eren had given me his phone number. His last name was Jaeger. He wanted to be friends with me. He gave me a copy of my own book, one that I had only finished writing a few months ago.

"Would you like to be friends?" Eren asked. His voice sounded small and nervous.

So, I thought for a few minutes in silence, and sighed. Just as his face fell, I spoke.

"Well, if you're interested in being friends with me for who knows what reason, then at least get a job somewhere else. I come here every day, I don't want you staring at me or anything weird like that. But I do my work here, so you can't talk to me while I'm busy."

He grinned widely, and that smile was definitely not the reason my face was starting to turn red. It was just hot in the restaurant, that was all. Definitely.

"Are you doing work right now?"

"I'm supposed to be. I interrupted it so I could prevent you from applying here and stalking me. So I have to go back now, but thank you for the book." I got up, and walked back to my table with Hanji.

As soon as I set the book with the note down on the table, she snatched it, and read the note. She was soon a giggling mess.

"Oh Levi, please take him up on his offer! He's such a cutie, you two would be adorable together."

"Ugh, shut up with the getting together stuff. He asked to be friends with me, he didn't ask me out."

"But you will at least do that, right? He even got you this book. I've read it; it really is amazing like he says."

"You sat here and wrote the damned thing with me. And I mean... I guess I can try."

"You better," she said sternly.

"Shitty glasses, let's just get back to work." We resumed thinking of ideas for my next book. But for some stupid reason, even after Eren left, he and his big green eyes kept straying to the forefront of my mind. I pushed it away, but it seemed to keep returning. What the hell was wrong with me? I was starting to get that feeling I used to get years ago, back when I had a romantic life. Was I getting a crush on him? I pushed the thought away, and continued working.

When I got home, I put his number into my phone.


	7. Chapter 7

I wiped my hands on my pants as I stood outside the bookstore. I was about to have a job interview, and I was a bit nervous. Mikasa and Armin had both told me to just stay calm and be honest. I was going to apply at the cafe nearby, but Levi had kept me from doing that. I blushed as I replayed the memory.

I had given him that book, along with my number and a request to be friends. A request which he had accepted. Though, it had been a few days since that happened, and I still hadn't gotten any texts from Levi. I just hoped he hadn't forgotten, or decided that I was too annoying for him or something like that. I knew he was probably just busy, but it was hard not to imagine the worse possibilities.

I stepped inside, and walked to the counter.

"Is Mr. Church here?" I asked. That was the manager, who I've actually talked to a few times before since I come here so often.

"Yes, come with me," said a red-headed girl at the counter. I followed her to the back of the store, where she knocked on a door. A tall man with dirty blond hair opened the door, and motioned for me to come inside.

"Good afternoon, Mr. Jaeger." He sat down at a desk, and I sat in a chair right in front of him. He extended a hand, and I shook it.

"Same to you, Mr. Church," I said. I felt way too nervous, considering I've already spoken to this guy before.

"I'm just going to ask you a few questions, okay?" It was a clear rhetorical question, and I just sat there, waiting to be grilled. He looked friendly, yet still professional. I was never nervous when I'd spoken to him before, but this time it was in a completely different situation. Finally, he spoke.

"Why do you think you would be good at this job?" Good. I knew this question.

"Because I'm good at working with people, and I also come in here often myself, so I would get along with the other employees easily, and could help people find what they're looking for."

"How often do you come here to buy books?"

"About every two weeks, or whenever any of my favorite authors publish a new book."

"Who is your favorite author?" I wondered if he was asking me this as part of the interview, or if it was just to help the conversation along.

"Ackerman. Their books are incredible."

"What do you know about our bookstore?"

"It's family-owned, run by the Churches and not part of a chain. Authors tend to come here for signings. Also, it's twenty-eight years old."

"Are you looking to work here part or full-time?"

"Part-time; I'll be going to college soon."

"Your application said that you didn't have any previous job experience, but according to your academic information, you seem to be a hard worker. Would you say that's true?"

"Yes." My voice shook as I spoke; I was getting more and more nervous by the second. Was the interview going well? I had no idea; it seemed like it was, but I don't know what a good job interview even looks like.

I asked my mind not to fail right now, when I needed to be calm the most, and what did it do?

It showed me a vivid image of Levi.

Fuck you, mind.

"Are you all right?" Mr. Church's voice penetrated my thoughts, bringing me back to reality and thankfully distracting me from my thoughts.

"Yes! I'm sorry, I'm just a little tired, but I'm feeling better than I was earlier," I said, trying hard to play off my sudden staring and blushing. Although, being tired didn't exactly explain blushing. He seemed to accept the explanation, though.

"Well then, that concludes the interview. We actually haven't had many other people come and apply, though, so although I can't officially hire you yet, I can say that you have a very good chance of getting the job," he said with a smile.

"Thank you so much!" I said, trying to contain my excitement. I got up, and exited the store as quickly as I could.

After I got into my car, I checked my phone, as I'd been doing much too often the past few days. Waiting for a text from someone. My phone said it had one new text, and I tried not to get too excited. But maybe, just maybe, it was him? I opened it.

And there it was.

**555-160-1225: This is Levi.**

I could feel the blood rushing to my face immediately. He actually responded to me. This was too exciting. I quickly saved the number with his name. And I was loathe to admit, my finger briefly hovered over the heart emoji when typing his name. It only took a second for me to get back in my right mind, though.

**Eren: Hi!**

Oh my god, what if I ask him to come see me here? Would he come? Would he think I'm creepy? Well, there's only one way to find out.

**Eren: Do you wanna hang out today? Or something**

I added the 'or something' to make me seem less excited. I don't think it worked, though. What am I doing, again? Who knows what I'm doing. I sure don't.

**Levi: Sure, I don't have much to do today. Where and when?**

Holy shit. I was expecting him to say no, to just brush it off. But he said sure. I think my heart might explode.

This crush is taking over my mind, and I had no way to stop it.

**Eren: I'm at the shopping center, right near the cafe and bookstore, are you busy right now?**

I held my breath, waiting for his answer.

**Levi: No. I'll be there in a few minutes.**

I sighed happily, and leaned back in my seat. I should probably get out of here so he can find me, right? I did so, and sat on one of the benches near the center of the shopping center. There was a large fountain in the middle, and I always liked sitting there. The sun felt warm on my face, it was comfortable outside, and my eyes soon fell shut.

"Hey, kid." I looked up suddenly, at Levi. I had just been about to fall asleep! Or, had I fallen asleep?

"Hi," I said, standing up quickly. He smirked.

"You drool in your sleep," he said. My eyes widened, and I reached up a hand to wipe at my mouth. Does everything have to embarrass me when I'm around him?

"So, where did you want to go?" he asked.

"U-uh, I don't really care, anywhere is fine!" I said. He rolled his eyes.

"Do you want to just walk around or something?" he asked.

"Actually, that sounds nice," I said. I thought I could almost see a flicker of happiness in his eyes, but that was probably just my imagination.

"Why did you agree to come see me?" I asked.

"Didn't you ask me to be your friend? I wouldn't normally do that, but I find you interesting." He still had a neutral expression on his face, somehow. I could barely contain my grin.

"Besides, I had nothing of importance to do today anyway," he said, immediately deflating my mood.

It must've shown in my expression, because he had a slightly amused look on his face. I tried to think of a different conversation topic.

"Did you read that book?" I asked. When I said that, he seemed to have a tiny, barely noticeable lapse in his composure. His eyes seemed to scrunch up, and his mouth twitched. In fact, it almost looked like... _He almost laughed?_

But in less than a second, the look was gone, replaced by his usual bored expression. I wondered if it had ever really happened.

"Yes, I did." he said.

"What did you think?" I asked. He hesitated before answering.

"It was certainly interesting," he said. Wait, what did that mean?

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"I meant that it was interesting, Eren."

My breath hitched. He just used my name. Damn, my name being said in his gorgeous voice was just too good. Unfortunately, I couldn't hide the blush that was now spreading through my face.

"You all right?" he asked. I nodded, struggling to pretend that that never happened. We walked around a whole longer, and as it neared lunch, we went into the cafe, the one where he apparently went every day to work. We ordered, and decided to eat outside.

"Levi?"

"Yeah?"

"Why do you always wear that?" It was a question that I had wondered about for a while now. I had yet to see him without his beanie.

"That isn't your business." His voice held a sharp edge, like I'd hit a sensitive topic. Why? All I'd done is ask about his cap.

"Oh, okay. I'm sorry," I said. God, I hoped I didn't just mess things up. Levi sighed.

"Don't apologize, it's fine." I felt a little better, but I was still curious.

We talked some more, and I got up to throw our trash away inside. As I came back out, a brown-haired lady with glasses was standing beside our table. She was the one who was usually sat with him in the restaurant, and was with him at graduation too. I hesitated as I approached the table, listening to what they were saying.

"What do you want? I told you, I'm not working today," Levi said.

"But you never, ever stop working! I want to know, it has to do with the cutie, right?" Levi's eyes finally glanced at me, and as they did, the lady whipped around.

"Ha!" she said, pointing at me. I stepped back from her. She turned back to Levi. "So it _is_ him." Levi shook his head, and for just a second, I almost thought I saw a tiny bit of color on his cheeks.

"Hanji, please leave us alone," he said, exasperated.

"Well, all right, but you've _got_ to tell me everything later." She winked at him, then turned around and left. I sat back down at the table, across from him.

"Who was that?" I asked.

"Hanji, my friend. Though I wonder why I call her that sometimes," he said. I fidgeted with my hands on the table. From what I heard, it sounded like he had taken off from work to see me, though I could be completely wrong. I might've been hoping for that to be true, just a little bit.

"Uh..." I started, "Did you take today off from... whatever your work is?"

"Yeah, why?"

"I was just curious," I said. Levi's expression was as unreadable as ever.

We walked around the stores for a couple more hours before heading home, and I learned a little more about Levi. Not much, since the most interesting stuff he refused to tell me, but I still learned a little. It seemed like his beanie, job, and family were the most sensitive topics, so I avoided those once he showed his disdain for them. And the more we talked, the deeper into this I knew I was getting into.

By now, I knew I no longer had a way out of this gradually growing feeling, one I would rather not name.

At least, not yet.


	8. Chapter 8

I stepped through the doors of my favorite store, and was immediately greeted with a suffocating hug from a redheaded girl. Her bear hugs could almost, _almost_ , compete with Hanji's, which was quite an accomplishment. After a few seconds, it became uncomfortable.

"Isabel, that's enough," I said, my voice muffled against her shoulder. She laughed and pulled back.

"Oh Levi, you don't come see us enough! It's boring here, except for on the signing days," she said.

"Well, I am kind of busy," I mumbled. She grabbed my wrist and led me over to the cafe on the side of the store. It was her lunch break, and she and Farlan had wanted to see me. It had been a while, I suppose. Writing, being diseased, and being followed around by a kid that acted like I was some idol were all pretty time-consuming. Not that I minded. Well, I obviously minded being diseased. But other than that, I didn't mind.

We sat down at one of the tables, not ordering anything. I simply sat there, waiting for the barrage of questions I knew would be coming. But the first thing she said was not a question.

"I read your last book," she said. I glared harshly at her, an unspoken message to be more discreet. We weren't the only ones in here, and this little place wasn't nearly as big as the independent cafe next door.

"Sorry," she said softly. "I wanted to tell you that you should try writing something happy for once."

"Well, I've been planning a fantasy novel," I said in a low voice that was almost a whisper. "It probably still won't be happy, but it'll be different." She clapped her hands together with excitement, and leaned back in her chair.

"Can you write me in?" she asked, in a louder voice. I knew she would be careful about her word choice, though, so I didn't try to stop her.

"Probably. I'm thinking it'll have a shit-ton of people," I said.

"Who will I be? What am I gonna do?" she asked.

"I have no idea yet," I said honestly.

"Well, you better show me what you have when you decide who everyone is." I shrugged, my own way of saying _sure_. Isabel opened her mouth like she was about to say something, but then closed it. After a few seconds, she tried again.

"Levi?"

"Yeah?"

"Uh... How is everything going with... You know," she said, looking a little uncomfortable. I didn't have to ask what she was talking about to know. She was referring to the thing that was eating up my life: leukemia. And how I would love to just brush it off, say it's no big deal, but that would be a lie. It really was eating up my life. And I fucking hated it.

"I'm... getting through it," I said. My voice wavered slightly, and I think she noticed. Thankfully, she knows me well enough not to push me into giving more detail.

It had gotten worse. I had been on a short break for a while, and when I got back on the medicine only about a week ago, the effects had come back with twice the force. I was fully aware that I looked like I hadn't slept in days, had light bruising all over me, and had lost even more hair and weight than last time. Yes, it was an angering situation, but I refused to whine to other people for their sympathy. That only pissed me off more.

"Anyway, Isabel, anything new with you?" I asked, wanting to change the subject.

"Ah, yes! We got a new employee," she said happily. "He's nice, and a little awkward, but he definitely works hard."

"That's good, you won't have to do as much work around here," I said. Before she could respond, a third person entered the conversation.

"She might not have as much work, but I'm still going to keep her from messing around," a male voice said. I looked up, and saw Farlan.

"Levi, you haven't been here in a while. Is everything going all right for you?" he asked, pulling up a chair from another table and sitting with us.

"Yeah, things are all right," I said. I'd never taken the time to realize this before, but "all right" was just wrong, the way people used it. If everything is going well, people don't say "all right." If some things are going wrong, but not terribly, that's when they use "all right." Well, according to the words themselves, things were not "all right." But, according to the way people use those words, I'd say I was.

"Hmm..." he murmured, looking at me knowingly. I didn't like the feeling I got, the one that said _he's reading your mind_.

"It's gotten worse, hasn't it?" he asked.

"Yeah," I said quietly. He offered a small smile.

"Well, if you ever need us for anything, we can always leave work early," he said.

"I know." I tried to convey finality in my voice, that I didn't want to talk about it anymore.

"Levi?"

The three of us looked over to where an employee was walking to our table.

"Eren? Wait, are _you_ the one working here?" I asked.

"Uh... I guess," he said, shrugging. At the same time, though, I could tell he was containing a smile. Isabel and Farlan, on the other hand, just looked confused.

"You two know each other?" Farlan said.

"Yeah! He's my friend,' Eren said. Wow, I did not blush when he said that. I did not. I did _not_...

"How'd you get this asshole to be your friend?" Isabel asked Eren. I rolled my eyes, and Eren laughed.

"He's really not that bad," Eren said. Just then, Isabel perked up, like she had thought of some great idea.

"Hey Levi, have you asked him if he wants to be in your new-"

" _Isabel_." I cut her off, kicking her leg under the table as I did so. Eren did not need to find out that he's been friends with his favorite author all this time, at least not yet. I think if he found out, he wouldn't act the same around me. Truth be told, I really did enjoy spending time with Eren. I didn't want him acting differently just because I write his favorite books. And that was the same reason I couldn't tell him about the disease yet. I just don't want him to look at me differently because of my secrets.

"He doesn't know?" Isabel asked incredulously.

"No," I growled, "but he will if you keep talking about it."

"What's going on?" Eren asked. I looked up at him, and almost laughed at the completely bewildered look on his face.

"Nothing, kid. Don't worry about it," I said.

"Please don't talk about me like I'm not here. I'm sure I can handle whatever it is," he said, now starting to look a little angry. Before I could say anything, Farlan stood up, followed by Isabel.

"Our break's over, we'll see you later Levi!" Isabel said, cheerfully going back to the checkout counter as Farlan went towards somewhere in the back.

"Don't you have to get back to work too, kid?" I asked, trying to keep my voice steady. I was getting a little worked up about this.

"No, I only work part-time, and I was off right before I came over here," he said. "So why can't you tell me whatever _it_ is?" It was obvious that his frustration was building up; I needed to calm him down before he started raising his voice.

"Listen up, because I'm only going to say this once. I have a bit of a secret. Maybe even more than one. Only my friends know, and you'll know eventually, too. I just don't want to tell you about that stuff yet. Okay?" Eren looked at me with solemn eyes, thinking about what I said.

"Okay."

"Good. Now come on, let's go look at some books," I said, "Unless you're too tired of seeing them or something." He shook his head, and we went off to look at books together. We'd both already seen just about everything the store had to offer, but it was still fun. Eren got the cutest smile when explaining the books he was passionate about. Which, in many cases, were mine. He told me of how he wanted to meet Ackerman one day and talk about 'their' stories with 'them.' It felt as if my face was constantly burning red, and I desperately hoped that it wasn't as bad as it felt.

After a while, we parted, and I walked right into the large cafe next door. And, for the second time that day, I was assaulted by a bear hug as soon as I entered the building.

"Levi! I saw you walk out with the cutie! How's it going with him? You didn't answer any of my questions!" she babbled. Oh yes, her fourteen questions about Eren she had sent me at 1:17 this morning, waking me up from the short span of sleep that had taken quite a struggle to even get into. How could I forget about those.

"Hanji, come on, get out of the doorway," I said, dragging her over to our table. We sat down, and I awaited my interrogation.

"What's he like? What do you to do together? What do you talk about?" she asked. I sighed, wondering at first if I should even answer any of those, but I figured that would be the only way to get it over with.

"He's pretty smart, a little awkward, and gets frustrated easily. We go to the bookstore sometimes, sometimes other stores. We talk about anything." My short answers seemed to be satisfactory enough for her, seeing as she didn't immediately tell me to elaborate, or ask me anything else at the moment. I decided to take the opportunity to ask her about something. I'd been thinking about doing this the past few days, and I hoped I wouldn't regret it.

"Hanji?" I asked, avoiding looking at her.

"Yes?"

"Can I ask for your advice on something? It does _not_ mean I'll take it, I just want to hear your opinion."

"Ask away, Little Ravioli!" She had wide eyes, and was leaning forward on the table. I almost never did this, so I suppose it made sense for her to be so excited.

"So, um... Eren is, um... a good kid, and-"

"You like him," she nearly hissed. She grabbed my hands from where they were resting on my side of the table, and squeezed them in a grip like no one else had. She looked at me expectantly, probably just waiting for me to deny it.

"Actually, yes I do." Her eyes seemed like they were going to fall out of her head at this point. A wide grin spread across her face, and I could just see the questions forming in her mind.

"What advice do you need?" she said. I knew she was using huge amounts of self-control to restrain herself, and I appreciated it.

"I think the feeling might be mutual. Maybe. So, what do I do?" She just looked at me with an odd expression for a few seconds, then burst into laughter.

"Oh Levi, you're hopeless," she said, trying to regain her composure. Great. Just the type of advice I was looking for. After another minute or two she stopped laughing.

"You two go on dates right?" she asked. After seeing my glare, she added, "Well, maybe not dates, but you go places together, don't you? You don't even have to ask him about something like this. If you think he likes you, then he probably does! Just find an opportunity to try holding his hand or something, and as long as he doesn't pull back, you're good. Try it!" she said.

"Wait, I just hold his hand out of _nowhere_?" I asked skeptically. Was this really good advice?

"Not out of nowhere, find something fun to do, and sit together, then when he's not looking, touch his hand and see if he does it back."

"Hm, okay. I might just try that," I said. We spent a while more discussing what place would be best.

When I got home from the cafe, I pulled out my phone, and asked Eren if he wanted to come to a certain place I knew he would like.


	9. Chapter 9

I ran my fingers through my unruly hair one more time, hoping to smooth it out at least a little bit. But, as I'd known from the beginning, it was a lost cause. I gave up, and regarded my clothes one last time. Button-down shirts look nice, right? And jeans are always good. Why was I paying so much attention to how I looked? Because I was about to go see Levi, and for some reason, it made me actually look at what clothes I had before I put them on, and wonder what he would think. Wow, this couldn't be good for me. Crushes make one vain, apparently.

"Eren?" I jumped when I heard Mikasa's voice. She looked at me suspiciously.

"What?" I said.

"When did you start dressing up just to go get food?"

"Uh... I'm not dressed up," I said, grimacing at how weak my voice sounded.

"Right. So, who is it you're dating?" she asked.

"What? I'm not dating anyone," I said. My quickly reddening face was not helping my case. But it was true, I really am not dating anyone.

"Then why do you keep going out all the time?"

"I have to go out for work, Mikasa," I said. Damn, that was a bad excuse. Her face told me she saw right through that.

"Even on the days you don't have work?" I sighed.

"I promise you, I'm not dating anyone. I've been seeing one of my friends, that's all." Well, I told her the truth, and she still doesn't seem to believe me.

"Is it a friend you like?" Or maybe she did believe me. I hoped.

"Why do you need to know?"

"That's a yes, then. And because I need to know who to beat up if you get hurt."

"Oh," I said. I should've thought of that before, knowing her. "Thank you, I guess, but you won't need to be hurting anyone."

"Which friend?"

"A new one. I have to go, I'll see you later." I tried walking past her and through the door, but she caught my arm.

"Be careful, Eren. If he does anything, I'll make sure at least half of his organs stop functioning."

"Uh, all right then," I said, eager to escape the awkward conversation. She let go of my arm, and let me leave. If she was catching on, that meant Armin had already figured it out too. Actually, knowing them, they probably discussed it, then just needed a way to confirm it with me. That was a nice thought.

It had been a few days since I saw Levi in the bookstore, and I was currently about to drive to the cafe beside it, where he goes to work on... whatever his work is. He always seemed to be writing something in a notebook whenever I saw him there, and Hanji was always pointing to things he had written. I made sure not to approach them while they were busy, but I had a burning sense of curiosity whenever I saw them. But, I figured that whatever they were doing had to do with the "secret" Levi had mentioned when I last saw him.

I pulled into the parking lot, and got out. I looked at my reflection in the window of my car, making sure I looked okay before heading into the restaurant.

Levi and Hanji were in their usual spot, though this time, they seemed to just be talking instead of working on anything. I wondered if I could go over there. Well, there's no harm that can come from trying, is there?

Before I even took a single step towards their table, I got my answer.

"Hey, Eren! Come over here," Hanji called out. I walked over to their table, my heart beating faster and faster the closer I got. That was always something that happened when I was around Levi, but I tried to ignore it. Hanji patted the spot beside her on the booth, so I sat down. As soon as I did, Levi snapped his notebook shut.

"We're working right now, why'd you bring him over?" Levi said irritably. Hanji just laughed, and turned to me.

"Levi wanted to ask you something," she said. Levi's eyes widened, and he shook his head.

"No I don't, don't listen to her, kid," he said. The weird thing, though, was that his face seemed to go pale rather than red. Is that normal?

"He wants to ask you to go somewhere with him," Hanji said, watching Levi as she spoke.

"Right..." He said. He seemed to have a strange expression, and his face was still not back to normal.

"Levi? Are you feeling all right?" Hanji asked, apparently seeing the same thing I was.

"Mmhm," he mumbled, now staring off into space. Hanji gestured for me to get out of the seat, and I did. As soon as she slid out of the booth, Levi slumped forward, unconscious. Oh, god. What was wrong?

"What happened? Is he okay?" I said, my voice starting to rise with worry. She lifted him up, and kept him in the seat for a few moments. After a couple minutes, he woke up, but he still looked completely out of it.

"He's fine, just low on the right kind of blood," she said.

"Right kind of blood?" I had no idea what was going on, and this was really scaring me.

"Yep. It happens sometimes, Little Ravioli's just gotta get a transfusion and he'll be fine. Come with me, we're going to the center." She got Levi to stand, and the three of us walked to the car. He was staring forward blankly, and was leaning heavily on Hanji. We must've been an odd sight to everyone else in the cafe, but I didn't care one bit if everyone in the restaurant was staring at us. I just wanted Levi to be safe.

We got into the car, and she put Levi in the backseat.

"You get in the back too, and make sure he's all right until we get there," she said. I did as she said, and sat beside Levi. He was staring out the window, not saying anything. He was still unnaturally pale, and his hands were shaking. Then, a thought came to mind. Maybe he was scared too? I hesitantly reached across the middle seat, and gently grasped his hand. He looked at me, still showing no expression, though I noticed that his frigid hand had stopped shaking. I squeezed his hand, and held it all the way to wherever we were going. I hoped he wouldn't mind when he was okay again.

"Will he be all right?" I asked, my voice shaking. I felt like I was about to have a heart attack.

"Yeah, don't worry about him. He'll be back to his normal grouchy self soon," she said. From where I was sitting, her face looked serious, though she didn't seem to be freaking out like I was. Well, I guess she must be used to this kind of thing with him.

It felt like hours until we got there, but we finally pulled into a parking lot. I got out on my side, then went over to Levi's side, where Hanji was helping him out. She held an arm around his waist, and walked him over to the door. I rushed to hold it open for them, and let them go inside. Once I stepped inside, several people wearing scrubs were already flocking to him, apparently knowing exactly what was going on. They took him from Hanji, and brought him down some hallway. Hanji then came over to me, and led me to some chairs, and we sat down together. As the panic started wearing off, I realized that I had no idea where we were.

At my questioning look, before I even asked here where we were, she told me.

"We're at Shiganshina Cancer Center." Wait, cancer center?

"He passes out sometimes because of his medicine, we'll get to see him in just a minute. Don't worry, he's fine," she said. "And I'd tell you why we're here, but I figured it's probably just a good idea to let him do it on his own."

"Okay," I said, having no more words than that. I waited nervously, my hands fidgeting with each other, and I constantly watched the door that led to the hallway down which they brought Levi. Soon, a lady with blonde hair stuck her head out, and called for Hanji. She and I got up and went to the door, following the lady down the hall, until we stopped in front of a room. I took a deep breath, not knowing what I might see, and walked into the room.

Levi was laying on a bed, a dark red tube sticking out of his arm. His face seemed to be slightly better, though he was still staring at nothing. His eyes flicked to me as I came in after Hanji. I decided to stay back until I saw how he was doing.

"Hey, Little Ravioli," Hanji said, walking up to him and poking him on the cheek. He swatted her hand away, grumbling something I couldn't hear.

"How are you feeling?" she asked.

"Like shit, but everything is so warm," he said, an odd smile forming on his face. It didn't seem quite right, though.

"He's still out of it right now, but he should be feeling better within the hour," the lady in scrubs said, "I'm Petra, by the way. Levi's oncologist." She extended a hand to me, and I shook it.

"I'm Eren, Levi's friend." At this, Petra grinned widely.

"Eren, huh? Levi talks about you all the time," she said, "You're just as cute as he claimed." And suddenly, my face was a billion shades of red and pink all together.

"I'm just kidding. But he really does talk about you all the time," she said. Was it bad that the first feeling that I had was disappointment when she said that? You know what, I don't even care.

"Nah, he is pretty cute."

That didn't come from Petra or Hanji. All three of us turned around, and saw Levi. He was staring at me for a few seconds, before looking blankly at some point on the wall. Hanji and Petra exchanged glances, and burst into laughter.

"Aw, I think you two like each other," Hanji said teasingly, poking me in the side.

"Nope," I said automatically, my face attesting to my horribly obvious lie. Hanji just looked at me knowingly, and right then I got the feeling that she had known how I felt towards Levi for a while. She probably had. But at the moment, the main thing I was thinking of was what Levi had said. Did he really feel the same thing, or was he just saying that because he wasn't thinking right now? I had to get my mind thinking of something else.

"Um, so, did you say you're his oncologist? That's like cancer treatment, right?" I asked.

"Yes I did, we're at a cancer center, silly," Petra said.

"What... What does he have?" I said in a smaller voice. Petra looked at Hanji, and Hanji spoke next.

"I was going to wait until he tells you, but considering he hasn't told you yet, we might as well do it now," Hanji said. I turned to look at Petra, whose expression now had that serious look that medical people could do so well.

"He has leukemia," she said, "also called blood cancer, by some." Leukemia. I've read a little bit about that, just enough to know vaguely what it does. I also knew a little bit about the side effects of the medicine used to treat it.

"Wait," I said, putting the pieces together and realizing something. Petra and Hanji watched me expectantly, as if they knew what I was going to say. "That's why he wears the beanie, isn't it!"

"Yep," Hanji said. "I'm the only person who's seen him without it, but maybe he'll let you see too sometime."

"Eren?"

We all looked at Levi again. His face had that wonderful slightly irritated expression that he wore constantly, and he seemed to be back to normal. Petra quickly detached the IV, and left the room with Hanji, leaving us alone.

"Hi, Levi," I said, sitting in a chair right beside the bed. A small smile was on his lips; though this time it was a sweet one, not a delirious one. He didn't say anything at first, just held out his hand to me hesitantly. I took it in mine, and squeezed it gently. I couldn't keep the smile off my face, I was just too happy. After a moment of us just enjoying the physical contact, he spoke.

"Thank you."


	10. Chapter 10

_"Nah, he is pretty cute."_

Did I really say that a few minutes ago? I knew I had passed out, then gotten a blood transfusion. Having a low red blood cell count normally made me tired, but when it was low enough to make me pass out, I was always a bit delirious. But delirious enough to say something like that- that's pretty unusual.

My mind was finally going back to normal, and as it did, the events of the past while came back to me slowly.

I woke up at the cafe, Hanji made me sit in the backseat of her car, Eren sat beside me, and then...

Eren held my hand.

 _He_ held _my_ hand. Well, that's not how I was expecting today to go. I was going to take him to the place where I always went to write when I was younger. Then, I was going to try holding his hand, if the right moment happened.

I found it one day when I was wandering around in the woods that were a little ways away from where we lived. My guardian, Kenny, and I, didn't exactly live in a neighborhood... No, you couldn't in good conscience call it anything but a slum.

To escape the disgusting place where I lived, I would go to the woods and explore them. I'd always bring my notebook as well, and work on my stories. One day, I found one perfect, isolated place for this. I had discovered a cavern the day before, and had resolved to return and look at it. And so I did.

There weren't any branching paths, just one short and shallow tunnel, so I found the end quickly. It was nothing incredible, but I found it beautiful. Then again, anything that was an escape from that slum was beautiful to me.

At the end of the tunnel, the roof opened up, and the sun shone through it. The spot on the ground where I would lay down was covered with a patch of grass, since it was exposed to the sun and rain. I loved that place, and I used to go there every day, at any time of day. _That_ was where I was going to take Eren. Even though I couldn't do that today anymore, I decided to make sure I take him there eventually. I pulled myself out of my reminiscence, and looked at my surroundings again.

I was still lying in the bed with a now-empty IV tube sticking out of my arm. Eren, Hanji, and Petra were also in the room, having some conversation I didn't bother listening to. At present, I was most preoccupied with wondering if Eren really does feel the same way as me. He _had_ held my hand, after all, and I just couldn't stand being unsure about this any longer.

"Eren?" I said. At this, Petra detached the IV, seeing as it was now empty, and she and Hanji left the room. Eren sat down beside me, and took my hand in his. What could I possibly say next? My heart was pounding the moment his skin touched mine. Nothing too risky, I supposed.

"Thank you." Eren smiled, and squeezed my hand. He didn't say anything for a minute, probably also trying to figure out what to say.

"Are you feeling better?" he asked.

"Yes, a lot. Um, E-Eren..." I sat up in the bed, and looked away from him. I guess this was the moment, huh? I could kiss him right then. He could back away and never see me again. We could continue being friends, but things would be awkward between us. Or he could kiss back and we could be... together. I mean, holding hands isn't exactly something a lot of platonic friends do, so there must be a chance. Would I try it?

Yes. Yes I would.

I looked back to him, and put my hand on his shoulder, pulling him closer to me. His eyes flicked between mine and my mouth briefly, before closing. His head tilted to the side, and then contact. His lips were soft, and I wish I could've paid more attention to them, but excitement like nothing I've felt before was running through my body. His tongue touched my lips, and I immediately complied. We eventually pulled apart, and I had the great pleasure of seeing a red-faced, smiling Eren. He looked like he was trying to say something, so I waited for him to speak.

"Levi, I really like you."

"I don't like you," I said, trying to keep my face straight. He looked confused, not realizing it was a joke.

"I'm kidding, do you think I just kissed you for no reason? Of course I like you." Eren made a false angry expression, like a pout, and then just rolled his eyes.

"Anyway... You never told me you had to come here," he said.

"It was kind of one of the secrets I mentioned. I can't stand people acting like I'm dead already. I'm probably not even going to die anyway, and even if I do, people feeling bad for me isn't going to change it," I said.

"I guess I can understand that. But Levi, I'm not going to treat you any differently," he said.

"Thank you, Eren. Now when can we get out of here?"

"I'll go find Petra." He went out of the room, and I got off the bed. That went much better than I had expected. Sure, I was expecting it to work out considering all the signs he'd given off, but it was still a huge relief. And I guess... I have a boyfriend now. Eren is my boyfriend. Well, Hanji's freak out will soon be approaching. It had been, what... a year? A year since I'd dated anyone. I guess this also means that I'll have to tell him who I am soon, but I really don't want to yet. I hate keeping secrets from the kid, but... I suppose that when the opportunity seems right, I'll tell him. I heard a click, and I looked up as the door opened. Eren, Hanji, and Petra came in.

"You can leave, Levi." Petra said, smiling. Meanwhile, Hanji looked like she might explode. Her eyes were wide, and she was obviously trying very hard to hide a grin. Eren, however, looked pretty uncomfortable. Well, I think that clears up what happened outside. Hanji was certainly one to interrogate people when she thought something had happened.

I walked with Eren and Hanji outside, and back to the car. We had to go back to the cafe, since Eren's car was there. Hanji got in the front, and I decided to sit in the back with Eren. I had a feeling I knew what was coming. As we started driving, Hanji didn't say anything, just kept glancing at us in the rearview mirror and giggling occasionally.

"Hanji, what the fuck is it?"

"So," she said, drawing out the _o_ , "Is there a new couple I should know about?" Eren blushed and looked out the window.

"Maybe," I said. "If you interrogated Eren, I'll have to lock you in a room somewhere an-"

"Oh no, no, no, I could just tell. He didn't say a word." I looked at Eren. Well, I guess it wasn't too hard to see that something was up. He reached across the seat, offering his hand to me shyly. I took it, and thankfully, Hanji didn't say anything else until we got to the cafe. We got out, and she was still in the car.

"Levi, I think we can work more tomorrow. You're already ahead, you might as well have the rest of the day off," she said, looking between Eren and I mischievously.

"All right, bye weirdo," I said.

"Bye my Little Raviolli," she said, and drove off. I looked to Eren, and we went back inside the cafe, sitting where Hanji and I would normally sit. We sat and talked for a while, easily becoming more comfortable than ever. He was a sweet kid. We seemed to fit right in with each other, like it was just meant to be. Not that I believed in all that sort of stuff, but we definitely were compatible, I would say.

 

* * *

 

 When I got home that night, I looked through all my idea pages for the new fantasy novel I was writing. Hanji had wanted me to write a romance novel a while ago, hadn't she? Well... maybe I'd surprise her and mix in some of that with the fantasy world I had created. I smiled slightly, and started writing.

 


	11. Chapter 11

"So, you're spending the night with him."

"Yeah," I said. Mikasa stood with her arms crossed, an unreadable expression on her face. I could feel the tension, and wondered what she was thinking. We were standing in front of Armin's house, and were waiting for him to answer. Tonight was the day they would both meet Levi for the first time, and I hadn't told Mikasa until just now that I would be going to his house later today.

Levi and I had already been together for a month, it wasn't exactly what I would consider "too early." Besides, we weren't going to do anything _too_ weird. I'd already told him I wasn't ready for going too far, and he had agreed. Though, we hadn't specified which things were in the _not too far_ category. Honestly, I was kind of hoping for _something_...

Though, I suppose Mikasa might be a little more accepting if I had introduced her to Levi already.

"Well, okay. Remember, you can always call me if you need anything," she said.

"I know, I know," I said, already even more distracted than I had been before. For several reasons. Just then, the door opened.

"Hey guys! I'm ready to go," Armin said, looking much more cheerful than either of us. We got in the car, and started driving to the restaurant where Levi and Hanji went every day. I had already told Mikasa and Armin a little bit of how we met and how they always worked together there, so we figured it would be best to go to the restaurant and have lunch. That way, Levi and Hanji could get some work done before we got there. I got out my phone, and sent Levi a text to let him know we were on our way.

**Eren: We're coming!**

**Levi: Good, please hurry the fuck up. Hanji is killing me. I need something to glue her mouth shut.**

As I was typing my reply only a few seconds later, I got several more texts from him, all in quick succession.

**Levi: Eren, are you eggnoring me?**

**Levi: You reply so slowly, this is uneggceptable.**

**Levi: You only reply when it's necessary, that's eggstremely rude of you.**

**Eren: Hanji, give Levi his phone back**

**Levi: This is eggsactly what I'm talking about.**

Instead of replying, I just waited. I could just imagine what was going on in the cafe right then: Hanji giggling in her own maniacal way, holding Levi's phone over her head whenever he tried to get it, him not wanting to cause a scene in the restaurant, and then resorting to just glaring at her and not speaking until she gave it back. A few minutes later, my phone buzzed, and I checked to see if the real Levi was back.

**Levi: Sorry, Eren. She took my phone. Please save me.**

**Eren: We're almost there, don't worry**

In a little over five minutes, we arrived. I took a deep breath, and started walking towards the door. Mikasa and Armin stood behind me, letting me lead the way. I was extremely nervous for some reason. The only difference from usual was that Mikasa and Armin were here, I didn't know why I had suddenly gone back to how I acted around Levi when I had first met him. I hoped he wouldn't mind my hands being sweaty.

Who am I kidding, he totally will.

We stepped into the cafe, and I immediately looked towards Levi and Hanji's booth. As usual, they were there, though there was something different: Levi was wearing a black button-down shirt, and _damn_ , did it look good on him. Normally he just wore t-shirts, like me, but he had apparently dressed up a little for this. I hadn't been expecting him to. His usual black beanie had been exchanged for a navy blue one, and it looked good on him. Matched his eyes.

He smiled very slightly, something almost undetectable to the untrained eye, while Hanji started vibrating in her seat. More than usual, anyway. We approached them, and as we did, they got up and moved to a table for more room. I sat beside Levi, who sat beside Hanji. Mikasa and Armin sat across from us.

"Hi! I'm Hanji. This cutie here is Little Ravioli, but you may know him as Levi," Hanji said in a rush. Mikasa and Armin both were looking between Hanji and Levi, then back to me, as if they were trying to figure out the relationship of Hanji to either of us. After a few more confused seconds, Armin spoke.

"I'm Armin, and this is Mikasa. It's nice to meet you two," he said. Meanwhile, Mikasa looked suspicious.

"Hanji, who are you to Levi?" she asked.

"Oh, I'm his ed- OW! Levi, that hurt!" she said, interrupted by Levi kicking her under the table not-so-subtly. "I mean, I'm his partner in his job and we're also best friends." While I understood that it was just to keep his job a secret, Armin and Mikasa weren't aware. I was sure, at this point, that they had the completely wrong idea.

"Uh-huh," Mikasa said, now not even trying to hide her suspicion. Armin stayed quiet, probably just trying to analyze what was going on himself carefully. The table was filled with tense silence for several seconds.

"Why do I get the feeling you idiots are thinking I'm messing around with Hanji? Do you _really_ think I could tolerate being around her for more than a few hours a day? Besides, if you haven't noticed, she's female. I'm not the least bit interested in those," Levi said, rolling his eyes at the end. Great, it's the first time meeting, and Levi's already being a sassy asshole and Mikasa's suspicious. Though, I had had a feeling they might not get along too well.

He leaned back in his chair, and his hand came to rest on my knee. I tried to discreetly wipe my hand on my jeans before holding his hand, but he saw. He didn't say anything, just gave me an odd look and held it anyway before turning his attention back to Armin and Mikasa.

Apparently his bluntness was quite effective.

"We never said that, it's just... Well... I expect you to treat my brother well, Levi."

"I do, and will continue to do so." Levi and Mikasa stared at each other for a few more seconds, and then the mood became noticeably lighter.

"Are we all good now? You two are way too serious," Hanji said brightly, "and don't you worry, Mikasa, Levi couldn't make himself be interested in a girl to save his life, and I'm aromantic anyway." I glanced at her, a little surprised. I knew she wasn't with anyone, but I didn't know that about her. Levi didn't seem surprised, but considering they are "best friends," according to Hanji, I suppose he would know.

"Sorry about that, it just looked kind of... Weird, I guess," Mikasa said, starting to smile a little.

"Don't worry, silly, it's fine!" Hanji said. Levi's irritated expression had melted back into his normal one, and I was glad to see it.

"Levi, I was wondering something," Armin said. It was the first time he had spoken in a while, and he still looked deep in thought, as if he was trying to figure something out.

"Hm?"

"What is your job?" Levi's grip on my hand under the table tightened immediately at this question. There was a brief silence.

"I prefer to keep that a secret."

Armin's eyes widened slightly, but didn't reveal whatever was going through his head.

"Okay, that's fine," he said. Levi shot him a glare, seemingly out of nowhere.

"Don't worry, I won't," Armin said. I looked back and forth between him and Levi, as Mikasa was doing as well. Hanji, however, seemed to be perfectly aware of whatever was happening right next to us. But Mikasa and I were missing something, because I had no idea what was going on, and I could tell she didn't either.

"What's going on?" I said, sounding a little more annoyed than I had intended to. Hanji looked at Levi expectantly, as if she were silently asking him a question. He looked at me.

"Eren... I'll tell you tonight, okay? Not in public." I was confused, but happier. Maybe this meant he would tell me what he does for a job, finally.

"All right," I said. And the rest of our conversation carried on like normal, and by the end, all four of them seemed to be on good terms with each other.

Mikasa took Armin home, then we went back to the apartment. I got my bag of clothes and other necessities ready, and a few hours later, Levi came to pick me up.

 

* * *

 

 

"Your house looks really nice, Levi," I said. It was small, considering he lived alone, but neat and comfortable-looking.

"Thank you," he said, leading me to his room. _Our_ room, for tonight. I set down my bag, and followed him back out to the living room. This was our first time alone together in the last few days, and I was looking forward to it very much.

"Eren, come here," he said, his voice a little lower than usual. I walked over to where he was sitting on the couch, facing to the side. I sat on my knees, facing him, and put my knees on either side of his left leg. His hands went under my shirt, slowly sliding it up and causing me to shiver. I put one hand on the back of his head, careful not to make his beanie slide back, and the other clutched at his back. He leaned forward, and kissed me. It quickly turned into a passionate, messy kiss, and as we continued I brought my hands up to the top of his shirt.

My hands shook slightly as I started unbuttoning his shirt, and after I had fumbled around for several seconds, he started unbuttoning it on his own. His shirt was promptly thrown on the opposite end of the couch, with no regard for neatness. My hands were soon gently moving across his chest, trying to map out every inch of skin.

I pulled back from the kiss, and looked down at his chest. Objectively, he was a little thin, and had a few bruises, but to me, he looked perfect. He was perfect. He squirmed under my sight, and tried to make me look somewhere else, but I stopped him.

"Levi, you're perfect," I whispered, now looking directly into his eyes. He blushed, actually _blushed_ , and looked away from me.

"I don't think that's the word," he mumbled, still looking embarrassed.

"I mean it. Levi, I-" I stopped abruptly, realizing I had been about to say something important. Was I really ready to say it? I decided that it would be a better idea to wait on those particular words.

He seemed to realize what had just happened, and turned back to me.

"It's okay, Eren, I don't want you to do anything until you're ready," he said softly, a gentle smile on his lips. I gave him one more quick kiss, and we got up. He put his shirt back on, and we went into the kitchen.

"What do you want for dinner?" he asked, opening the pantry. "There isn't a whole lot here, does spaghetti sound good to you?"

"Yeah," I said. We made it together, and as we ate, our conversation eventually went to lunch with Mikasa and Armin. Which had reminded me, he had said he was going to tell me whatever had been going on, later today. I didn't ask yet, since he always seemed to get perturbed whenever his job was mentioned. Maybe a little later that night.

When we finished eating, I insisted helping him with cleaning up the dishes. As he wiped off the stove, I stood over at the sink, about to put my bowl under the water. But as I stood there, I noticed a small yellow pill bottle on the counter, along with some other items. I hadn't noticed it before.

It was then that I realized: I'd never asked Levi what his last name was. That was pretty embarrassing, but I mean, that's probably something I should know about my own boyfriend. It had just never come up in conversation. He knew my last name, but only because of that note I had given him along with the book. So I set the bowl down in the sink, and dried off my hands. I looked a little closer at the little yellow bottle that had a red "Chemotherapy" label on the side. I turned it around slowly, and saw the main label.

And at the top, in small letters, were the words " **Ackerman, Levi**."


	12. Chapter 12

"Levi?" I heard Eren ask.

"Yeah?" I said, turning around. And my whole body went cold. He had seen the pill bottle. With my name on it. I had been planning to tell him today, but I guess that wasn't going to go as planned.

"Your last name is Ackerman." Fuck, the kid was freaking me out. I couldn't read his expression. Was he mad at me for not telling him earlier? I needed to stay calm. I walked over to him, and gently placed a hand on his back.

"It is, that's what I was going to tell you once we finished cleaning." Eren just continued staring at it. It was really making me nervous. "Armin figured it out today. And I was putting off telling you because I want you to see me as a normal person. I know how much you look up to the famous author and all that, and I was worried..." I took a deep breath, speaking the next part quietly. "I was worried that you wouldn't see me the same way anymore."

He finally turned to me, and hugged me tightly. I sighed in relief, and hugged him back.

"Levi," he mumbled against me, "You were the main character in your last book." He pulled back, and looked at me with a pained expression.

"I was."

"You write because it takes you away from your problems."

"That's correct." What was he getting at? He stayed silent for a few seconds, then spoke.

"Are you still lonely?"

I put my hands on his waist, and stepped closer to him, my face inches away from his, my own eyes staring up into those perfect green ones.

"Not anymore," I whispered, and I kissed him. He wrapped his arms around me, holding me tightly next to him. We pulled apart, and I led him back to my bedroom.

I pulled out my bag of notebooks, and set them down in a pile on the bed. I sat down, and gestured for him to come sit by me. He did, and I opened a random notebook to a page filled with neat handwriting in pencil, and messy blue and red and green notes written everywhere.

"This is a draft of one of my older books. All the pen is from Hanji, she's my editor." I handed the notebook to him, and he looked closely at it.

"I've read this!" he said excitedly. He continued flipping through the notebook, all the way to the very back. It was cute, to see how excited he got.

"Levi, can you put me in a story?" he asked.

"Please don't freak out when I say this, but I already have." Seeing his confused expression, he was probably trying to think of the books he's already read. "Not a published one, it's still being written."

"Oh! Are you in it too? What's it about?"

"Yes. It's fantasy, takes place in the same time as my last book, but in a post-apocalyptic world. The last of humanity lives inside three giant walls, and there are monsters called titans outside them. Bt the military has to fight against them. You and I are in the military, though of course with different names. Actually, Hanji's in there too. So a Isabel and Farlan. And Erwin."

"Thank you for telling me, Levi," he said, smiling.

"Don't thank me, you're the one who found out."

"But you showed me all this. And... You're still just Levi to me," he said, pulling me closer to him.

"Just Levi? Is that a good thing?" Eren laughed.

"Yes, it's a very good thing," he said, moving his legs so that he was straddling me. He pushed me down on the bed, and laced his fingers with mine, kissing me desperately. My hips moved involuntarily against his, and apparently he felt it, because he sat up.

"Can I... Um... Do something?" he asked, his face turning pink in the cutest way.

"Go ahead." Eren pulled my jeans down slowly, and then off. He ran his hands up my legs, stopping at the fabric. I could feel myself already hard, and hoped he would hurry a little. But it was our first time doing anything like this, so he probably wanted to take it slowly.

He hooked two fingers from each hand at the top of my underwear, on each side, and started pulling down slowly. The friction from the fabric only made it more pleasurable. He stopped once he pulled it down low enough, and stroked me with a feather-light touch, causing my whole body to shiver.

He then leaned down, and dragged his tongue along the side, from the base to the tip. I could tell there were drops of precum starting to form, and he licked them up. Then, he took a deep breath, and put his mouth around my cock. I could easily tell he'd never done this before, but it still felt amazing. It had been so long since I'd had this done, and besides, it was Eren doing it. Eren, the kid I-

"Mm, feels good Eren," I mumbled, reaching down and holding the back of his head, feeling the silky strands of hair. I tugged on it lightly, and he voiced a quiet moan around my cock. And that was enough to get me close to the edge.

"Almost there..." I said, now breathing heavily. He continued for a few more minutes, and I came in his mouth. I watched him as he pulled back, and wiped his mouth on his sleeve. Gross.

He moved up beside me, and layed down facing me.

"How did I do?" he asked, a blush forming on his face.

"Fucking amazing. That was the best it's felt in a long time," I said, pulling him closer to me. We layed there with each other for a few more minutes, resting, and then I sat up.

"Eren, want me to do the same for you?"

"Yes please, Levi."

 

* * *

 

 

I woke up around nine with Eren wrapped around me. Literally wrapped around me: his leg went over both of mine, and his head was right next to mine. His arm was draped over my chest and on top of my other arm. Thankfully, we were clean and clothed, since I had refused to sleep after we'd had our fun unless we took showers.

I carefully removed his body parts from mine, trying not to wake him. I wonder, is he a light or heavy sleeper?

But as I sat up, my head spun, and I felt sick all of the sudden. Not like I was going to throw up, but just plain sick. This was bad. Really fucking bad.

I reached over to my nightstand, and scrambled through it for some paper. Considering my profession, it's easy to find all over my house. Grabbing a pen, I wrote a quick note.

_Eren,_

_I have to go to the cancer center, not feeling good at all. You can stay here if you want, but I don't know what time I'll get back. But I'm sure you have things to do. Don't worry, I'll be fine._

_Levi_

I texted Hanji, asking her to pick me up. Of course, she was at my house in a few minutes, and we were on our way.

"I don't understand, what exactly are you feeling like if you're not going to pass out?"

"I don't know, just _sick_ , something is wrong." When I had told Eren I'd be fine, that was mostly just so he wouldn't get upset. I don't know why, I just had a bad feeling about this time.

"Do you want me to stay with you in the room?" she asked.

"Yeah."

Soon, we were there. I got checked in, and went to see Petra.

"Hello, Levi. What's going on?"

"I'm not going to pass out, I just feel sick and it's not normal and I think something is wrong..." I said quickly. Hanji sat beside me, and held my hand. It was her own form of comfort, and I appreciated it.

"Well, we'll do a blood test like usual, okay? We may need some more tests if that doesn't give us answers."

"That's fine."

 

* * *

 

 

"You have an infection." I stared at Petra.

"Is it bad?"

"Normally, it wouldn't be so bad, but your immune system isn't functioning properly anymore. The chemotherapy destroys some of your healthy stem cells along with the cancerous ones, and it seems like your immune system has just been run ragged. I can give you antibiotics, but you probably need to be hospitalized soon." Petra sighed, and sat down in her chair, not looking at me anymore. "Levi, I'm going to tell you this with no sugar-coating. If we put you in the hospital, they'll do everything they can to help with the infection. Antibiotics will help, but they won't be completely effective. At this point, we just have to hope for the best. If it isn't fixed soon, your organs may begin shutting themselves down. I can't tell you how likely it is to happen or not happen, because it varies from person to person. But the sooner you get to the hospital, the better chance you have of making it. It's good that you came here so early."

I pulled my hand away from Hanji, and covered my face. So many thoughts were going through my head. I could die. I could actually die, and she was telling me that she didn't know if it would happen or not. What would happen to Hanji, Erwin, Isabel, Farlan? What would happen to Eren?

The tears were soon sliding down my face, and Hanji was hugging me tightly. Petra had left the room, leaving us alone.

"Hanji..." I mumbled, my voice sounding terrible.

"I'll stay with you every step of the way, Levi. You're going to make it. I _know_ you will. You're my stubborn Little Ravioli, I know that you'll be okay in the end." Her words just made me cry harder, made me think of leaving my best friend behind.

And damn it, there was _Eren_. He had come so close to saying those three little words yesterday. I felt like such an asshole. Make the kid fall in love with me, then die. I was in love with him, I knew I was. But I'd do anything to keep myself from hurting him.

So I made up my mind. If I was to keep from hurting him with my death, there was only one way I could think of to do that.

I had to leave Eren.

Even if I survived and went into remission, there was always the chance the cancer could come back. Then it would try to kill me again. I couldn't live forever.

Eventually, I stopped crying, and went into a strange, numb state. Hanji said she'd take me to the hospital, so she pulled up at my house for me to get whatever I wanted to bring. I decided not to tell her about Eren, since I knew she'd argue with me.

Eren was still there, getting his things ready to leave. Apparently, he had just woken up.

"Levi? Are you okay?" he asked, looking worried. I rushed past him, and went into the bedroom. I wrote a note quickly, and handed it to him as I was about to walk out the door.

"Bye, Eren," I said. And I shut the door before I could hear his response.

The tears came back.


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope this chapter is okay, I had some trouble writing it. Also, thank you for all the kudos and comments! They make me very happy, and I love hearing what people have to say.

"Bye, Eren."

That was all he said before rushing out the door. I looked out the window in the kitchen, and saw him getting into Hanji's car. I had a very, very bad feeling about this. He had given me a note, but I almost didn't want to read it. But... I had to.

_Dear Eren,_

_I'm sorry about this. I probably should have seen this coming. I'm going to the hospital now, and I don't know how much longer I'll be around. Thank you for everything. I've loved every moment with you, but I think now we should stop before we become too close._

_I'm in love with you, and I think I will be for a long time, or however much time is left. I don't want the same thing happening to you, and you having to deal with the effects after it's over. Even if I live, you deserve someone who doesn't always have the threat of death hanging over their head. Please try not to think of me too much, I'll be ok._

_Levi_

This wasn't happening. It couldn't be.

I grabbed my phone and called Levi as fast as I could, but he hung up as soon as it started ringing. He was in Hanji's car, though, so I called her next. It rang a few times, but thankfully, she picked it up.

"Hello," she said, her voice sounding strangely calm. Or maybe it was just in comparison to how I felt. My hands were frigid, and wouldn't stop shaking, and I was barely holding back from crying.

"Hanji I don't know what to do I feel sick and he needs to be okay but I think I might throw up and-"

"Calm down, Eren! I don't know what you're talking about. I'm in the car with Levi right now, you can come meet me at the hospital though."

"Please tell him I'm already- already..." I couldn't finish, at this point silent tears turned to sobbing.

"Eren, what's wrong? Are you crying?" She sounded legitimately surprised. Maybe Levi hadn't told her? I took a deep breath, and tried to say it again.

"Tell him I'm already in love with him. Tell him he's _not_ going to die, and tell him that _being sick isn't going to fucking keep me away from him!_ " My voice rose to a yell on the last few words, as I felt a surge of anger, and only a few seconds later, I was back to crying hysterically. I heard Hanji say something to Levi, though I couldn't hear what it was.

"I'm going to let Levi talk to you, is that okay?"

"Please let me talk to him," I said, my voice sounding weak from yelling. I was desperately trying to hold myself together, but failing.

"Hello?" It was the voice of Levi.

"Levi..." And it was this moment when I completely broke down. I couldn't get out a single word.

"Eren, please calm down. I... Didn't expect you to get this upset." He spoke quietly, but I couldn't tell what he was feeling.

"How? How could you just leave like that? Isn't this exactly what lovers are supposed to do? Be there no matter what happens? I was willing to do that for you! You asshole, I'm still willing to do that for you." My voice was shaking badly, but I continued. "If you're doing this because you think I'll get less upset this way, then you're wrong. You're not going to die, and even if you were, isn't that how you would want it to be? With the person you love? Levi, if that happened to you and I wasn't there, I'd be guilty for the rest of my life for not being there with you. But it's not even going to happen, a-anyway..."

At first, all I heard was silence on the other end. Then, Levi and Hanji talking briefly.

"Stay at the house, kid. We're picking you up." And then he hung up.

What was happening? I felt like I was in a nightmare. Maybe being with him really was just too good to be true. It seemed he'd never been truly happy in his life, and I had been determined to change that. I just needed the chance to do that. I tried to stop all the thoughts running through my head as I waited for them to get here.

Finally, I heard them pull up in the driveway, and I ran out. Levi was still sitting in the passenger seat, and I thrust open his door. He got out, and I hugged him tightly. We didn't say anything, I just enjoyed the feeling of his body against mine. His wonderful, living body that I love so much.

"Eren-"

"You better not be thinking about leaving me again," I mumbled into his shirt. For some reason, seeing him was making me cry again.

"I'm not," he whispered, now moving his hand across my back.

"Eren, I'm sorry for all this. If I wasn't sick, you wouldn't have to deal with this." I lifted my head up from his shoulder, and fixed him with a glare.

"Don't apologize for things like that. Don't let yourself change. I just want to see you, the person I'm in love with. Not Levi the author, not Levi who's sick, but just Levi." I looked away from him, I was too embarrassed to see his reaction.

"Eren, you really are stubborn." I looked back at him. He was smiling slightly, and I was still a little confused about where we stood.

"What?" I asked.

"I love you too." Levi's eyes never left mine, and he pulled me close, and kissed me. I was embarrassed, since my face was still red and covered in tears, but it felt good to have him against me again.

"Please don't ever do that again." He put his hands on my shoulders, stood on the tips of his toes, and kissed my forehead.

"I won't."

"Are you two done yet?" Hanji called from the car.

"Come on," Levi said, and we both sat in the backseat. He and I held hands all the way there.

 

* * *

 

 

"You two can come see him now," the doctor said. Hanji and I quickly went to his room, and opened the door. Levi was sitting up in the bed, writing something in a notebook. He closed it when he saw us.

"Little Ravioli, it has been too long!" Hanji said excitedly, immediately taking a seat beside the bed.

"It's been three hours," he said, looking at her exasperatedly.

"Exactly!" she said, then gave him a hug that looked crushing and probably was. I sat on the other side of his bed, and hugged him much more gently when she was done. He had an IV attached to him, and I wasn't sure what was in it. But he looked happy, and that was all that mattered.

The three of us talked for a while, until the nurses made us leave. Hanji and I got in the car, and she started taking me back home.

"Eren, what happened? I only heard a little bit," she said. Her voice was cautious, as if she was expecting me to get upset. Understandable, after all that had happened today.

"He tried to leave because he thinks he's going to die, and he didn't want to make me sad."

"Well, that does sound like selfless Little Ravoili. But he has yet to learn: sometimes if you're too selfless, you can hurt other people." I looked at Hanji. I've never thought about that before.

I've never realized until now how heavily they must rely on each other. Not just in the work way, but as friends. Levi kept Hanji realistic, Hanji uplifted Levi.

"Hanji, I'm really glad you're his friend," I said.

"Why is that?"

"You balance each other out. I think you'd both go crazy if not for each other." She smiled.

"You know, he tells me I already am crazy. You and Levi balance each other out too, you know." I looked at her questioningly.

"I don't know if he's told you, but he used to have some problems with depression. Until a couple months ago, anyway. In fact, I don't think I've ever seen him so happy."

"I didn't know that."

She and I kept talking all the way until we got to my apartment. I think we could both feel a little bit of uncertainty, wondering if Levi would be okay, but we both avoided the topic. Since all we could do is wait, we'll just have to make every moment count.

She dropped me off, and I went up to the apartment. As soon as I stepped inside, Mikasa rushed over to me.

"Eren, why are you home so late? How did it go?"

"That's a long story. Let's sit down."


	14. Chapter 14

The next few weeks were painfully slow. Hanji and Eren came to see me every day, which was always my favorite part of the day (not that I'd admit it). Eren started college, and I made sure he finished all of his work before coming. In fact, Mikasa and Armin even came a couple times too. Of course, Isabel and Farlan came as well. When there weren't people crowding my room, I had lots of time to work on writing. In fact, I would very soon get my next book published.

And though I hadn't told Hanji, I had been thinking about revealing myself soon. I had this idea in my head, a strange idea that I never would have even considered before, of having a signing event on the day of its release. It was a permanent decision, so it was a heavy choice. But I kept thinking back to the day I first met Eren, so excited to read that new book. Of all the times he'd told me how he'd do anything to meet his favorite author. And I just couldn't help but wonder: are there other people like that out there too? I was sure there were a few, but were there really enough to do this? All I could think of to do was to ask Hanji and Eren their opinions sometime, after I had thought about it more.

Hanji had, of course, loved the romance idea, and had turned the story into something completely different than I had planned. It turned out being half a story of a secret relationship between a captain and his subordinate, who was the main character, in the world of the titans. I did manage to keep the main story as the focus, so I was satisfied with that. It honestly had more sad plot points than happy ones, true to the rest of my writing, but this one was certainly different. I'd written in every one of my friends, though of course most of them had to be tweaked. Some of them we even partially based off of people Eren had told me stories about from when he was in high school. I loved listening to his stories. His eyes always lit up, and he waved his arms dramatically. And he had the cutest laugh, that I just absolutely adored.

So, I couldn't resist but to base the main character off of him. I had such fun writing about him, that the whole novel just seemed happier, in an odd way.

"Mr. Ackerman?" I looked up. A doctor had come into my room without me noticing.

"Yes?" He came to stand beside my bed.

"I have some good news for you. While your cancer isn't gone, it looks like the infection is gone. You're very lucky, it never got bad enough for your organs to shut down. Also, the leukemia may go into remission soon. We don't know for sure, but it does look like the amount of malformed cells in your blood are decreasing. Continue to be careful and keep going to regular appointments, and I hope that your health soon improves." The doctor smiled. "You're being discharged today."

 

* * *

 

"Levi, I'm so happy!" Hanji screeched, throwing her arms around me as soon as she saw me. We were outside; I had demanded that we at least be out of the building I'd been in for the past two weeks before I was assaulted.

"Shut up, you're being obnoxious," I grumbled, actually pleased to see her. Once she let go of me, I hugged Eren, and gave him a quick kiss. I ached for it to be longer, but with Hanji staring at us, that wasn't going to happen. As we walked back to Hanji's car, I kept thinking of how I would word this. I had finally made my decision.

"Guys, I've got a question." They both turned back to me, as we were now standing by the car.

"What would you think if I did a signing event for the next book?" And of course, I was met with shocked stares, just as expected.

"You would seriously do that?" Hanji said. Eren just looked at me, surprised, but he smiled.

"I think your fans would like that," he said.

"I think so too."

So we planned the event that day, and got a lot of it done. In a month, the book would be released, and I'd show up and sign copies. There was more to plan, but we had a good start.

 

* * *

 

"Levi?" Eren asked as he came into my room after a shower. He was staying over again; thankfully his sister was fine with it. It was early night, only around nine, and it had been two days since I was released from the hospital. He had already put on some clothes, which was mildly disappointing to me, admittedly. I was wearing a t-shirt, soft pajama pants, and, as always, my hat.

"Are you sure you want to reveal who you are?" he sat down beside me.

"Yes, I've been thinking about it for a while, kid. Why?"

"It's just that people might talk to you in public, and stuff like that..." he looked at me uncertainly, and I didn't reply, waiting for him to continue.

"I mean, I know you don't like a ton of attention. I guess I'm just trying to make sure that you won't regret it," he said. I chuckled and ruffled his hair.

"I won't. Eren, it'll all be fine." He took a deep and almost shaky breath, but didn't look at me. I moved closer to him.

"You okay?" I asked. He seemed to be thinking about something.

"Mm-hm. Just, uh... You'll be fine too, right?" he said, almost whispering.

"Yes. Actually, didn't I tell you what the doctor said a couple days ago when I left?" His expression was blank. I was sure I'd told him, but I guess we'd been too caught up in planning the signing for me to remember. Plus, it had become my habit to try to shove that particular topic to the back of my mind as best I can...

"No, what?"

"It'll probably go into remission soon." And immediately, his face split into a wide smile, and I heard that beautiful laugh of his. Before I could appreciate it fully, his arms were around me, knocking me over on the bed.

"Eren-"

"I'm so glad." he said softly into my chest, his hair tickling my neck. I kissed the top of his head.

"Me too." We layed there in silence for a few minutes, holding each other as if we hadn't in years. God, I'd only known Eren for a few months, yet it already felt like so long. I loved him more than I could put into words. I smiled, gently playing with his hair. His breathing had slowed down, and it looked as if he was falling asleep. He'd made me feel more happy, more alive, more _normal_ than I'd felt in a long time. I was in deep for this kid. So deep, I would...

"I would marry you."

"Hmm?" he mumbled. Fuck, that thought came out as a whisper.

"Levi, did you say something?" he sat up slowly.

"No. And are you sure you really want to sleep on top of me? I don't think it would be the most comfortable." He smiled, moving to the side of me instead.

"I would sleep on top of you as long as it doesn't involve actual sleeping."

"Oh my god Eren, you need to work on your pick up lines. That sucked."

"Well... Would you let me?" he asked, pulling me closer to him. Though his voice lowered, he still looked uncertain.

"Maybe," I said, leaning over to his ear, "But I think I'd rather be the one on top of you." I pulled back to see his face, and sure enough, he was blushing. How cute.

"God, Levi... You can't just say these things and..."

"And what?" I think I knew exactly what, but I was enjoying this too much. Tonight was going to be much more special than I'd anticipated. Eren's eyes flicked away from me.

"And not follow up on them." I leaned down, and kissed his jaw lightly.

"Oh, Eren," I murmured, trailing kisses up to his ear, "Who said I wasn't going to follow up on them?"

I felt him shiver, very slightly. Then, he reached behind my head, turned to me, and started kissing me desperately. His tongue moved against mine messily, and as we kissed, I started pressing my body against his, moving slowly, but enough to ignite the wonderful feeling of friction between us. He responded easily, until we were both a mess.

My hands slipped under his shirt, pulling it up, then off. I touched his chest everywhere, sucking, licking, feeling. I moved down to his tighter-than-usual pants, which were soon gone from his person as well. I took off my own shirt, and when I did this, I noticed that Eren looked like he wanted to say something.

"What is it?" I asked.

"Levi, do you think... that for this, we can be completely... naked?" he whispered the last word.

"That's kind of what I'm working on right now."

"No, I mean..." He sat up, and kneeled in front of me. He put his hands along the rim of my jaw, slowly trailing them up to the bottom of my beanie.

"I love you. I love all of you, Levi. I don't want you to be embarrassed about anything, because when I look at you, I see... Well, I see perfection. And, uh... I want you to see it too." He quickly looked down, face reddening.

I hesitated, knowing what he was asking of me. But, now wasn't the time to be self-conscious. We were about to give ourselves to each other. So, I smiled slightly and reached up to it. And in this moment, I wasn't uncomfortable one bit. Because I trusted Eren with every fiber of my being.

I hooked my fingers under the sides, and slipped it off. He smiled.

"You _do_ have hair!" I pushed him back down onto the bed so we were laying beside each other again.

"Not much," I said. The sudden bravery was starting to wear off. He must've noticed, because he wrapped an arm around me, and pulled me right by him.

"Levi, I'm pretty sure it's not _nearly_ as bad as you think. You're perfect." At this point, I really was getting self-conscious. So, I covered up the feeling by ending the mushy talk. I roughly grabbed his shoulder, and pushed him onto his back. I straddled him, held both his hands which lay beside his head, and kissed him desperately.

We finished stripping any clothes that were left, and I slowly moved my hand down his side, reaching his ass. I touched it softly, and squeezed it gently.

"Nn, Levi, please go ahead..." he groaned, making the most irresistable face I'd ever seen. His mouth was parted, his face was blushing lightly, and his body had a light sheen of sweat.

I reached over to my nightstand, and grabbed the bottle, opening it and pouring some onto my fingers. I moved back to Eren, who was on his back, and kneeled between his legs.

"You ready?" I asked.

"Yes, please," he said, a little breathily. I put one hand on his leg, and the other reached down to his opening. I gently slid my fingers in, preparing him. Once he seemed ready, I poured some more lube, and spread it on my cock. And very slowly, I slid into him. It seemed to go in easily, and I kissed him. In a few seconds, he started moving his hips. I took the cue and pulled back, groaning when I pushed back in.

"Levi, this feels, mmh, so good," he said. He held me tightly, and I kissed his cheek, giving him several small kisses up to his ear.

"Yeah, it does. You look so damned hot," I said softly in his ear, biting it gently afterwards. He looked like he was about to say something, but decided not to. We were moving in a steady rhythm now, and Eren looked lost in pleasure already. It was his first time, after all, and my first time in a _very_ long while.

I reached down and started stroking his cock, rubbing my finger against the tip, getting the sticky precum on my finger. I started moving it up and down, at the same time speeding up my thrusts.

I moved my other hand to his hair, running my fingers through it and tugging just a little. He moaned, and pulled me closer to him. We were both getting close already. I pushed into him as fast and hard as I could, him trying to meet my thrusts. I rapidly brought my hand back to his cock, and kissed him passionately. Our movements became erratic and desperate, and he called my name as cum spurted between my fingers.

"Levi-" he cried out, and as he did, I released into him. We layed there for a few seconds, panting, then I rolled over beside him. I looked over at him, and he looked back.

"I love you so much," I said. He moved closer to me, and rested his head against my shoulder.

"I love you too, Levi," he said, softly but audibly. We layed together, in silence. Soon, Eren drifted off to sleep. I was still awake when his breathing slowed down.

Here I was, lying in bed with someone I loved more than anyone in the world. Someone whose beautiful laugh could make me smile no matter what was happening. Someone who could look at me without even a bit of pity, but rather, with encouragement. Someone who could make me fall so, so incredibly in love.

I had only one more thought before I fell asleep that night.

_I'm going to marry him one day._


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I changed the plan a bit; this'll be the last chapter of this story. Some of the last few planned chapters were unnecessary, so I put all the important and interesting stuff into here. Enjoy!

I looked in the mirror, making sure my suit looked good. We'd pushed back the date for the release of the book and the event by a few months, as Levi had wanted to be perfectly healthy at his first public appearence. And healthy he was: he had gone into remission, and for the first time since I'd met him, the bruises had disappeared, his energy level had gone up, he had the sexiest black undercut I've ever seen, but most important of all, he was happy. Of course, he'd been happy before whenever we were together, but now it truly seemed as if the joy of living had come back to him.

"You ready yet?" He asked, coming into the bedroom. I turned around, and he walked up to me, regarding my outfit. He also had a suit. The evening event was going to be formal, he and Hanji had decided, as it would look best for first impressions. The two had been together much more than usual recently, and he refused to give me any more detail about the event than that.

"Yeah. What am I going to do once we get there?" I asked him as he smoothed out some invisible wrinkle on my shirt.

"Just go find Mikasa and Armin, I don't think I'll be able to talk until after the signing is finished. We're all going out to eat afterwards, by the way," he said.

"We are? You could've told me that sooner," I said, crossing my arms, though I wasn't really annoyed. I loved seeing them.

"Mm hm. We were going to make it a surprise, but I figured you'll have had your fair share of that tonight."

"Huh?"

"Well, none of us know how many people it'll turn out to be. It could be a mess, I really have no idea how it'll go. You might as well have something to look forward to if it sucks."

"It is not going to suck. Do you know how many people want to meet you?" I said. He took my hand and started leading me to the door.

"Probably a lot. Which is precisely why it might be terrible. But don't worry, I'm not changing my mind. Now come on, we need to go." And I was happy to comply.

 

* * *

 

 

We could hear the loud thrum of voices through the car as we pulled in the parking lot. Luckily, our spot, as well as the spaces of Hanji, Erwin, Armin, and Mikasa had all been reserved. We'd rented out a gathering building designed for events like these, and it wasn't difficult to dress it up to fit the occasion.

Levi was looking out the window, and while his left hand steered, his right was held in mine. He removed it when we backed into our spot. And when he turned the car off, he didn't make any move to get out. Levi was looking out the window, looking a bit... Nervous? That wasn't normal. His hands were held together, and he seemed tense.

"Levi?" He turned around to look at me.

"Yeah?"

"Are you okay? You seem nervous. But you'll do fine, I know it," I said. I gave him a smile, and leaned over to him, giving him a short, but firm, kiss. "All you have to even do is sign things and be nice to people."

"Yes, I'm feeling better. Thank you, kid." He smiled slightly, but I could tell he was still a little worried. "Ready to get out?"

"Yes," I said. I heard him take a deep breath, and as soon as he opened his door, I opened mine, and we stepped out. We got to the sidewalk leading into the building, and as we did, I looked around. Just as I'd expected, there were a ton of people- the majority were adults, both young and old, but there were also a few who looked like young teenagers, standing with what I assumed to be their parents. As we walked, I even saw a news van with people unloading equipment from it. Among the sea of people, most were dressed formally; but there were the few who weren't, standing out as specks of mismatched bright color among the crowd of black, white, and deep shades of satiny red and blue.

For a minute, I wondered why no one was surrounding Levi when they saw him. When I realized why it wasn't happening, I shook my head, berating myself in my head. I guess I'd just gotten so used to knowing who Levi is that it just seemed normal to me.

"Eren! Levi! Get your handsome selves over here!" Before we even turned around, I knew her voice. We turned around to see Hanji, and approached her. Standing with her were Armin and Mikasa, and I could see Isabel and Farlan making their way to us from their car.

"Do you know how excited I am? Do you?" Hanji asked. I could almost feel the air vibrating with her enthusiam. Levi waved his hand vaguely.

"Yeah, let's just get this over with," he said, looking away from me. What was with him tonight? He never acted nervous, and even if he claimed not to be, I could tell.

"You two take care of him, we're going in to start," Levi said to Armin and Mikasa. One gesture from Hanji, and they disappeared into the crowd, being swallowed up by the masses. I looked after them, and turned to face my best friends.

"You want to go in and watch?" I suggested. Mikasa rolled her eyes.

"You just want to stare at him because he's in a suit."

"Well, I can't say you're wrong... But seriously, I want to see how it goes."

"Yeah, let's go watch," said Armin. So the three of us went through the crowd, each holding onto a piece of each other's clothing so we wouldn't get separated. Finally, we made it into the building.

Inside, the room was decorated in simple, elegant white and gold. The large chamber itself had already been painted a very light gold color, and the decorations had added to it. There was a large table near one of the walls, and Levi, Hanji, and several other people I didn't recognize were standing near it and talking. Probably some people from the publishing house. I smiled, seeing as he was the shortest person in the group. By far.

The building itself had more rooms, but this was the only one we would be allowed in. I briefly wondered if the other rooms were as lavish and beautiful as this one. The tv crew had worked their way into the building, and were trying to get a spot close to the table.

Armin, Mikasa, and I got as close to the table as we could, and waited for them to get started. Within a few minutes, Levi had slid into his spot, Hanji sitting beside him, but facing backwards towards the wall. Judging by Levi's exasperated expression, he didn't know why either.

There was no announcement, like I had been expecting. As soon as they sat down, the volume in the room heightened quickly as people were finally getting to see who the famed "Ackerman" was, and a very messy, but discernable, line was formed.

 

* * *

 

 

After a few hours, the line had thinned down considerably. Hanji was rushing over to me from the table.

"Eren, Levi wants to see you when the signing is done," she said. I felt my stomach twist. Is that why he had been acting weird? Was he going to break up with me tonight? The thought of it made me feel weak.

"What for?" I must've made a face to reflect what was going on in my head, because she started laughing.

"Nothing bad, silly, don't you worry. Just don't go off and get lost somewhere with your friends in the next ten minutes." And with that, she went right back to the table.

And it was then that I got an idea. I looked at the line, the end of which was clear. I walked over, and got in the back of the line. If I leaned to the side, I could see Levi at the table, writing furiously, or at least that's how it looked. He must've been eager to finish; I'm sure he was tired.

The line advanced quickly, and soon I had reached the front. Levi handed off the last person's book, and tapped his pen against the table impatiently, waiting for me to put mine down.

"Levi."

He looked up, and his expression changed from stressed to relieved. I grinned.

"Oh, Mr. Ackerman, it's such an honor to meet you. I've read all your books, and I can't believe it's really you," I said. He chuckled.

"I can't believe I'm meeting you either, kid. Come on, we've got something to do." He stood up, and gestured for me to follow him. He didn't take hold of my hand, as there were still some fans left in the room, but he did once we were out of sight. He led me up the stairs, and down a short hallway, to a door.

"You can open it," he told me. I opened it slowly, a little confused, then stepped out. We were on a balcony. It was dark outside, but the sky was clear enough to where some stars were visible. The balcony overlooked a small garden outside of the event building, shielded from any view of the road. It was a nice change from the building: the air outside was comfortably warm, and it was quiet.

"This place is beautiful," I said softly. He and I walked over to the smooth stone railing, and leaned on it. And a little against each other.

"It is." He took a deep breath, looking at something down below us in the garden. I wrapped an arm around his waist, pulling him closer to me.

"Eren..." he said, his voice soft.

"Hmm?" I replied, noticing that he still looked a little anxious.

"Uh... I have something I wanted to tell you." He moved away from me just enough to face me, though he was still looking at the ground.

"Go ahead," I said.

"Well... I... I'm really glad that we met." He finally met my eyes, but when he did, his widened quickly and he corrected himself.

"No, that didn't sound how I wanted it to. I mean, I'm really happy to be with you. You helped me when I was sick and not feeling like doing anything anymore. You made me feel alive then, and you still do now. I love being with you, any time we can." He took a deep breath. I opened my mouth to reply, but I was unable to think of what to say. My mind had gone completely blank. He reached into the pocket of his tuxedo jacket, and was holding something in his hand by his side. I already had a guess as to what it was, and I was about to burst from happiness that absolutely nothing could beat.

Of course, I was soon proven wrong about that. He got down on one knee.

"Eren, I love you. So much more than anything else I've ever felt. All our time together, well... I hope it lasts a long, long time. And I'll do whatever I can to make you feel the same way for as long as we live."

He took a deep breath, and opened the little box. I couldn't even pay attention to the ring inside, I was watching Levi. He held my gaze, and took one more breath.

My heart pounded, and I looked into those perfect blue eyes.

"Eren, will you marry me?"

"Yes."

He slid the simple silver ring onto my finger, stood up, and hugged me like we hadn't seen each other in years.

"I love you so much, Levi," I whispered against him. My eyes were tearing up, and I didn't trust my voice at this point.

"I love you too."

 

* * *

 

 

Out of all the stories in our life together, this is our favorite. Levi continues to write stories, of course, and they've only grown in popularity. But out of all his books, the dramatic, serious, romantic; the best one is the unpublished one. The one that has always been kept out of the public eye.

This story that we have, it simply can't be published. It doesn't have an exposition, climax, and resolution. It continues through the rest of our lives, constantly being added on to every day; characters coming and going, in and out. This tale of ours didn't end. And it's more magnificient than words can capture. So every day, we keep spinning our tale.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is my first ever multi-chapter fanfic I've completed! I can't believe it. I really hope you all enjoyed it. Thank you so much for your comments; they encouraged me more than I can describe. I'm working on the plan for my next multi-chapter story at the moment, so that won't be posted just yet. But please check it out when it is, and stay tuned for one-shots and short stories! Again, thank you so, so much.


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